Something Comfortable
by Lilybet.Kate
Summary: After a horrific incident over summer Holidays James and Lily shock the school when they return to Hogwarts friendly. Their peace is shattered when tragedy strikes threatening to drive all they hold dear over the edge.
1. What Just Happened?

**A/N: So this chapter has been edited as i really didn't like it. Still not the best but in my opinion it gets better in later chapters. Enjoy.**

It was 10:45 on September 1st 1977. On Platform 9 ¾ the returning students from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry were greeting each other after the summer holidays as the younger students clung to their parents or bid them farewell. For all the buzz and noise it was relatively quiet on the platform. Only the older students knew why – the absence of James Potter and Lily Evans. As the younger students gazed around the platform in awe, the elder ones frowned. Lily Evans was never this late and for all his flaws neither was James Potter.

"Maybe they killed each other over the holidays." Sarah Harvey a 7th year Gryffindor whispered to her best friend Rachel King, also a 7th year Gryffindor.

"Don't be silly," Rachel laughed "but you're welcome to ask her later."

The entrance of three students however shattered the peacefulness of the platform. The two dark haired best friends strode through the barrier for platform 9 ¾ . Sirius Black was the school bad boy with the highest detention level in the history of Hogwarts. With his long black hair and striking grey/blue eyes he was also the hottest boy at Hogwarts and knew it. The other Boy was James Potter. He had messy black hair, perceptive and mischievous hazel eyes sparkled behind round glasses and his body was toned and fit due to years of Quidditch training. The two boys and their best friends the sandy haired and sensitive Remus Lupin and the dumpy, nervous Peter Pettigrew made up the Marauders Hogwarts group of mischief-makers.

"JAMES POTTER PUT ME DOWN!" No one had noticed Lily Evans, hanging over James's shoulder. Lily was the smartest, and some would say - because of her long, wavy red hair and bright green eyes – most stunning girl and Hogwarts. She hated James Potter with a passion and Potter had the biggest crush on her. So it was no surprise that she was screaming at Potter to put her down or that he just shook his head laughing. What did surprise every single returning student at the station that Lily started laughing as well. "Come on James Please put me down, I can walk you know" Lily begged

"No can do Lil, Sorry"

"Sirius," The pretty redhead turned her head towards him, "Please?"

"Sorry can't help you Love," he said between chuckles.

The whole platform held their breath. Lily hated it when anyone called her Love especially Black and Potter. They again gasped in shock when Lily just stuck her tongue out at him.

"Jamey," She whined, "Please let me down,"

"Not happening sweet," he told her.

"James Potter put me down or I'll turn you into a goldfish."

"Ok fine, fine," he chuckled before flipping her over his shoulder so she stood in front of him.

"Thank you," She muttered before doing something that shocked everyone on the platform even more than they thought possible, she lent over and gave James a hug. The station was quiet except for Black's incessant chuckling.

"Padfoot stop giggling you sound like a teenage girl." James told his friend

"I am not giggling," Sirius Huffed "and I am certainly not a girl,"

"Wanna bet," Lily muttered under her breath.

"What was that Love?" Sirius asked, "Did you want me to show you,"

"Ewww NO WAY," she shrieked before hiding behind James "James make him stop," she giggled

"Padfoot stop offering to show your assets I'm sure no one on the platform wants to see that."

"You do don't you Love?" Sirius winked at Lily

"Let's just go find Moony," James said wearily. Before the three 7th years walked onto the train, leaving a speechless platform behind them.

"What just happened?" Rachel asked Sarah.

"I have no idea."

_SomethingcomfortableSomethingcomfortable_

Remus Lupin looked up mildly from his seat next to the window as James, Lily and Sirius came barrelling into the compartment he was sitting in on the Hogwarts Express. Remus was not surprised in the slightest to see Lily with the boys as he had stayed at the Potter's over the summer right up to the full moon the weekend before.

"Did you hear the silence on the platform?" Lily gasped doubled over at the door

"Yes," James chortled, "That was brilliant."

Remus calmly placed a bookmark in his book before looking up at the three "We haven't even left the station and you three are causing mischief." The three in question just stood there grinning at him. "I expected better from the two heads," he chided trying and failing to keep the grin off his face. James just smirked while Sirius howled with laughter and Lily looked slightly ashamed.

"So..." Remus said "Are you gonna tell me what happened or not?"

At the thought of the incident on the platform the trio standing started laughing again. When they were finally under control and sitting in the compartment - Sirius next to Remus, James opposite him and Lily with her back against the wall with her legs out in front of her – they all began talking at once.

"Okay, okay," Remus laughed "One at a time"

"Well," Lily began "Just before we walked through the barrier this oaf here," she paused to kick at James before continuing "Decided that my legs had failed me, so he picked me up, swung me over his shoulder like a bag of grain and walked through the barrier just like that."

"And she wailed like a banshee," Sirius chimed in before flinching away from Lily's death glance "Sorry Miss"

James chuckled before picking up were Lily left off, "So anyway as we walked through the banner with Lily screaming - what sweet it's true," he told the aforementioned girl "Everyone on the platform stopped talking and looked at us in shock."

"Wait let me guess." Remus cut in "Because of this you felt the need to ham it up in front of the whole school,"

"Guilty as charged," Sirius grinned "Though, they weren't looking at those two getting along," he jerked his thumb in Lily and James direction "It was probably my dashing good looks." At that the whole carriage burst out laughing. "Good one," Remus choked out. Sirius just looked offended.

After the four in the compartment calmed down, Sirius continued "Well we won't bore you with details, but the funniest things were when we called Lily flower here her pet names,"

Lily then cut him off " and when I hugged James don't forget that." Remus chuckled as he imagined that picture, they sure would have shocked some people.

"But the best part," James said "would have to be when Sirius offered to show Lily his family jewels, and she didn't hex him." The compartment was riddled with laughter for a few minutes before Lily sat up straight and swore, "James we're supposed to be in the heads carriage for the Prefect meeting!" she said panicked

"Oh all right don't get your knickers in a knot." James's eyes twinkled

"Come ON!" She whined trying to pull him along. James just smirked at he before picking her up like she was a rag doll, "Later guys," he said to Remus and Sirius before carrying Lily toward the head compartment bridal style.

As soon as the two heads were out of earshot Sirius turned to Remus, "Does it seem like they act like just friends to you?" Remus thought for a moment.

"I'm not gonna answer that coz I don't want to jinx it." he winked.

SomethingcomfortableSomethingcomfortable

An hour later James and Lily weren't back yet. Remus was reading his book and Sirius was bored. "Whatcha Reading?" he asked Remus, bouncing up and down on his seat.

"The same thing I was 30 seconds ago Padfoot," Remus said, quickly losing patients with Sirius.

"Oh... I'm bored,"

"SIRIUS BLACK!!" The entrance of the two heads cut of the rest of his rant.

"FINALLY!" the two in the compartment cheered as they entered.

"Did we miss something?" Lily asked bemused.

"I was soooooo bored with out you Love, you to Prongsie." Sirius yelled at the same time Remus groaned "He has been bouncing on that chair and wouldn't shut up since twenty minutes after you left." Lily looked at the boys strangely while James chuckled.

"Now" he said as he and Lily settled back into their previous positions "That prefect meeting was hell." The other three people in the carriage chuckled. "It wasn't that bad." Lily said.

"Yes it was," James retorted "I don't know how you dated Diggory for half of last year, I mean how could you stand him? And how is it possible to have a stick that far up his arse? "

"Don't remind me," Lily groaned as Sirius and Remus laughed.

"Hey, has anyone seen Peter?" Remus asked when the Hogwarts express was about an hour away from the castle. The carriage was silent as the group contemplated this. "No," James said eventually "I don't think I have." The four thought for a moment before Lily snapped her fingers "I've got it," she said, "Remember he said he'd be late back this term?"

The boys looked blankly at her before shaking their heads "Nup."

"You boys are hopeless," She sighed "He told you when he was over at the mansion a few weeks ago."

"Did he say why?" James asked

"No," Lily thought, "Now that you mention it he didn't."

"It's probably a private reason," Remus said, "There is no mystery involved, so stop thinking like that," he said giving Sirius a pointed look


	2. Tea and Sympathy

**A/N: Chapter dedicated to theadventuresofjamesandsirius (Soz i didnt get it BETA'd no time eep!) **

As the Marauders and Lily entered the great hall, most of the seated students turned to stare at them.  
"Well this is uncomfortable." Lily whispered to James at the same time Sirius chirped "Smile and Wave Jamesy Boy, Smile and Wave." Remus and James looked at each other and burst out laughing, causing everyone to look at them. "Come on, drama queen." Lily whispered as she grabbed James's forearm and dragged him to the Gryffindor table.

As the four 7th years sat down, all conversation around them stopped. There was awkward silence for a minute before James winked at Lily, causing her to giggle, and Remus and Sirius to share a knowing look. Before anyone had a chance to comment on the strange interaction the sorting began.

After the sorting was finished and the food appeared people began to talk about James and Lily again. Rachel and Sarah looked at the two thoughtfully.  
"I thought she hated him," Sarah whined "And now she doesn't, I'm confused."  
"I dunno what happened," Rachel said "Maybe it was desperation, after all, her Best friends graduated last year, and well she's to smart for us."  
"Well if she's to smart for us, why is she spending time with them?"  
"I dunno," Rachel said, "But I intend to find out."

Meanwhile down the table the topic of their discussion were talking quietly.  
"People will expect us to pull a prank." Sirius was whining "and we haven't so we're gonna let them down."  
"No we won't," Remus patiently explained "If we do it another time then, they won't expect it."  
"Yea." James piped in, "We were getting to predictable, let's make them worry and shake it up."  
"Just nothing that will get you in trouble," Lily said firmly  
"But Lily," Sirius whined  
"But nothing, if you're all in detention who will I get to terrorise." she winked. The dumfounded look on Sirius' face caused them all to break into peals of laughter.

_SomethingcomfortableSomethingcomfortable_

James and Lily climbed through the portrait hole into the heads common room exhausted. They had spent over two hours in Dumbledore's officelearning about their dutiesand now all they wanted to do was sleep. There fatigue was however forgotten when they saw the room that was to be their home for the next year. The carpet was a deep royal blue, and the walls were creamy white, at one end of the room was a crackling fireplace surrounded by chairs and a fluffy shag carpet. On the other-side of the room there were two bookcases and two study desks with plush green chairs. Opposite the portrait hall was a door, which upon discovery led to a bathroom. On either side of the bathroom there was a sweeping staircase with gold handrails.

"Wow." Lily breathed impressed, as she was not used to such lavishness, even after spending most of her holidays at the mansion (as the marauders and her refereed to the Potter mansion) because of -no she forced herself not to think about it.

James looked around the room with mild interest, to him it was nothing special, he turned to look at Lily to see what she thought and he caught THAT look on her face. "Lily?" he asked. She shook her head as if waking from a dream, "So," she asked changing the subject, "What do you think?"

"Oh it's all right." James replied loftily, after getting the hint, "but I was expecting a butler and a maid." Lily giggled at this and he just grinned at her. "Shall we see what is up those staircases?" he asked her offering his arm.  
"Yes we shall," she replied trying to keep a straight face as she latched onto his arm and climbed the left staircase.

Up the staircase was a bedroom that was obviously James'. It was spacious and roomy. The floors were covered in a ruby red carpet, One of the walls was a window and the others were painted Black with gold trimming, there were two doors in the room, one leading to a huge bathroom, which was tilled completely white with a large shower against one wall, and a beautifully carved basin against the other. In the middle of the room was a large bath, with millions of taps. A little bit – Lily reflected – like a mini version of the one in the prefects bathroom. The other door led to a big walk in wardrobe - this time painted emerald green, big enough for both of their clothes Lily thought amazed. The two returned the bedroom to really look around. Against one wall was a huge four-post bed, double the size of the ones in the dormitories. At the base of it sat James's trunk. Across from the bed was another desk, with a plush writing chair, and on the desk was a wireless. In the corner of the room sat a giant armchair that Lily just wanted to sink into, big enough for two – or even three – people.

"Wow," Lily said again  
"You sure say that a lot," James teased her.  
"Oh shut up." she mumbled before descending the stairs to go check out her bedroom.

Despite her intention of leaving James behind he had caught up to her before she had even begun climbing her staircase.  
"Good thing these stairs are so small," She told him quickly getting over her anger "It would completely tire us out."  
"Talk for yourself." James quipped cockily, before yelping as Lily pushed him down a couple of stairs, and ran the rest of the way to her room laughing.

Lily's room was the same as James's though her walk in wardrobe was painted lilac and double the size of his, and her walls were white and gold instead of cream and gold. As well as the arm chair and desk there was also a vanity table, full of millions of jars of creams and make-ups, many of which she didn't know what they were for. Instead of a normal four-post bead against the wall, a round version sat in the middle of her room. On seeing the bed James ran up to it and started bouncing up and down on it. "Come on," Lily said, "Don't break my bed."

The two went back down to the common room and sat in the armchairs opposite each other by the fire to chatted.  
"You know I'm really worried about this head thing." James told Lily honestly when the fire started to die down. "I keep thinking Dumbledore has made a mistake, or is playing a joke on me."  
"James.." Lily started sympathetically  
"Don't you dare tell me he had his reasons." James snapped "That's all anyone has said to me, but he doesn't. What reason does he have for choosing me? or does he just want to embarrass me." He half wailed as he place his head in his hands.

Lily looked at James, contemplating what to do. This was the problem with James, she decided because he seemed so strong, people thought he could take things and he couldn't, she was so glad he liked her enough to trust her. She couldn't tell him straight out he was wonderful for the job, he'd just think she was trying to comfort him. No she decided, She must do it with a grain of salt. "James," she began cautiously "He must have had his reason, no don't cut me off let me finish." She held up her hand. "You may not be the most responsible student, nor the best role model,"

He did cut her off then, "Are you trying to make me feel better or worse?" he asked dryly  
"Shhh let me Finnish." she said gently "But you truly care about everyone, well except for the Slytherins" She added at James' look, "your extremely loyal and above all else your a great leader, I'm sure more than half the school would take to washing in dungbombs if you told them to." At that picture the two burst out laughing. Once he had calmed down enough James looked at Lily seriously.  
"Thank you Lily." he said quietly "I don't mean to be insecure I just wonder..."  
"Don't worry about it." She smiled before getting up from her chair "Now I'm gonna go to bed, I don't know about you, but I don't wanna be late to class tomorrow."  
"You go, I'll just stay down here for a while." she smiled at him sympathetically before kissing his cheek and walking to her stairs. "Don't think to hard." She whispered before leaving him there, starring into the fire.

**A/N: Hope i didn't bore you to much with the description of the common room, but there were some nice L/J banter in there, the end bit was to add some story to this well story and i dropped a couple of hints about the summer. Also, I didn't get this chapter Beta'd as i wanted one last chapter before i go back to school.**


	3. The Mystery of Obsessions

**A/N: Chapter dedicated to DesireeBoils **

The first Saturday afternoon of the school year found the Marauders sprawled around the heads common room. Lily sat at her desk, trying to concentrate over the noise the boys were making. After half an hour of the racket Lily had had enough.

"Will you guys please SHUT UP!" she shrieked at them "I'm trying to work." The Marauders all smirked at her, "Love what on earth are you working on?" Sirius asked.

"Homework." She huffed.  
"What homework? we've had one day of lessons, and all the teachers did was go on and on about the importance of our NEWTs."  
"Our NEWTs are very important."  
"Yea, but they're not till the end of the year."  
"SO, it's good to get an early start."

"Sirius leave her alone." James said, however the arguing pair didn't hear him over the noise they were making, they continued arguing for another five minutes until Remus, getting fed up at them cast a silencing spell.

"Good," he said calmly, "Now you two listen here, it doesn't matter what Lily is doing it's her own business," Sirius opened his mouth to speak, "No buts, now can you both behave like young adults?" Lily and Sirius sullenly nodded, "Good" Remus removed the silencing spell.

"Lily, Sirius is right." James suddenly "Do your homework later come and sit with us." he said gesturing to himself and the other three boys.  
"Well...." Lily said  
"Come on Lils," Remus said "We really didn't get any homework."  
"OK fine." she said re-rolling her scroll and getting up from the desk.

The Marauders all sat around the fire. Sirius lay on his back on the rug, Remus and Peter sat in the armchairs Lily and James had occupied a couple of nights previously while James sat at one end of the couch. Lily sat on the opposite side of the sofa to James.

"So Peter, Where were you yesterday and on Thursday?" Sirius suddenly asked, sitting up and facing the nervous boy.  
"I wa..wa..was ummmmm." Peter stuttered.  
"Leave the poor boy alone." Remus stated "There's no mystery."

"Pads I think you've taken this obsession with mystery books to far." James told him.  
"I mean you have the whole collection of Agatha Christie books." Remus teased.  
"No I Don't," Sirius was offended "She wrote about an old batty lady, I much prefer Nancy Drew, now SHE was HOT." There was a stunned for a minute.  
"Umm Sirius..." Lily was cut of by Sirius,"Don't judge me, those books are so intriguing I just HAVE to solve them, and I won't stop until I do!"  
"He's read all 100 books." James explained to Lily, "and he still hasn't 'solved' one yet."

"Hey there have only been 98 books, 18 Nancy Drew files and 80 originals." Sirius tried to defend himself when Lily looked at him like he'd grown another head he continued "I especially loved the phantom of Venice, does she love Ned? doesn't she? Oh,it was so exciting." he was squealing like a little girl by the end of his speech. "I mean I don't see how anyone can think the Hardy Boys are better, Nancy Drew totally would kick their arse's." Sirius was breathing heavy now. There was another shocked silence, as everyone looked at Sirius as if he was more mental than they thought possible  
"Sirius that is totally messed up." James shook his head at his friend.

"YEA well at least I don't read ...... Jane Austen, yea that's it! At least I don't read Jane Austen!" Sirius exclaimed.  
"Hey that was like last year."  
"So it was still your obsession. Now what it that you said again?" Sirius put in a high pitched voice, "Oh yea, Mr Darcy is such a prick but he still gets a happy ending, why can't I have a happy ending with...." here Remus cut him off, "Leave him alone Sirius, it was for a month and he isn't and wasn't nearly obsessed as you, he doesn't tell random people in corridors that Nancy Drew owns the Hardy Brother's arse and they know it so why pretend otherwise."

"Yea well that was only one hundred and eighty seven times, Mr. Little House on the Prairie." Remus blushed as red as a tomato.

Lily thought it was time to intervene, "The Little House on the Prairie is an awesome book, and I agree with James, My Darcy IS a dick and it's not fair he gets a happy ending, anyway Mansfield Park is much better. I'm so glad that boys are taking interest in classic literature." James looked a little flustered and Remus grinned at her, "As for you Sirius, Nancy drew is a Mary-Sue and well, your obsession is quite scary, I don't see why you even read them."

There was silence for a few minutes as Sirius thought of his answer,"Because she's HOT."  
"So your telling me," Lily said in disbelief "you read _98_ books because the main character – who you can't even _see _is hot??"  
"Why are you so shocked?" James asked "it is Sirius."  
"Yea but how does he even KNOW that she's hot?"  
"because I've seen her?" 'Sirius said like it was obvious  
"HOW have you seen her? SHE'S A CHARACTER IN A BOOK!"

"because Pamela Sue Martin is HOT. I mean have you seen her?"  
"WHO? I thought we were talking about Nancy Drew here?" Lily was really confused and angry by now so James decided to put her out of her misery "He's talking about the Tellyvisy snow."  
"The WH- ... Oh you mean the television show." She nodded "Wait, how do you know about the TV show, I mean you can't even pronounce the word, and I doubt you can even use it."  
"HEY I resent that, how else would I have watched it?"

Remus thought now would be a good time to interrupt. "You went to the electronic store down the street every weekend for the first weeks of the holidays to watch it there."  
"Moonyyyy, I was trying to sound smartical."Sirius whined  
"Well you weren't gonna fool ANYONE," James laughed.  
"Not even the first years," Peter spoke for the first time in this whole conversation. Lily didn't know why but she got the feeling that Peter didn't like her very much.

"What are we gonna do for a prank?" Sirius whined, obviously realising with three against one he wasn't going to win. "People are starting to think we're on the straight and narrow, and that IS NOT GOOD!!" he was hyperventilating.

"OK, OK, how bout a removable swamp?" Remus offered.  
"Nah did that in 4th year." James said.  
"Enchanted Armour."  
"1st year, come on Moony,"  
"How 'bout changing the Slytherin's robes pink?" Peter suggested.  
"Good one." Sirius said.  
"Nah,we tried turning them red and gold last year."

"Hey wait a minute." Lily said, sitting up removing her feet from James' lap – where they had ended up over the course of the conversation – and swinging them to sit properly.

"Lillllllly. Oh PLEEEEEEASE don't ruin our fun." Sirius begged, at the same time Lily swore she heard Peter whisper under his breath "I told them this would happen."

"Guys I'm not gonna stop you, just I have an idea, and no one will get hurt."  
"AWWW." Peter and Sirius whined.  
"Well you gotta grow up some time," Lily said, as Remus and James nodded their heads, Sirius muttered something that sounded suspiciously to Lily like 'whipped'.  
"But it WILL be funny."

_SomethingcomfortableSomethingcomfortable_

Later that night Lily looked up from her bed where she was sitting reading as James knocked on her doorframe.  
"Goodnight." he simply said to her.

"You to," she whispered blowing him a kiss, he walked over to her bed, kissed her on the forehead and swiftly walked out of her room back to his. This was a nightly ritual of theirs that they started when Lily spent the summer at the Manor, sometimes it kept the nightmares away, and sometimes it didn't. Lily sighed and turned out her light, only one way to find out.

Lily was walking along the road towards her house, she knew straight away where she was and when this was. She tried to stop, she wanted to stop so bad but she couldn't. She couldn't stop she couldn't slow down she just kept going she started to shriek. Suddenly the scene shifted, she was now sitting huddled in the corner of her room at the manor, hands on her ears rocking back and forth, back and forth, singing the song to herself, the door opened slowly and in walked Mr. and Mrs. Potter. Mrs. Potter held out her hand to Lily, and after a few moments Lily took it. The scene changed one final time. Lily was sitting in her bed at the manor, crying and wailing. The door burst open and their stood James in her door way, his wan illuminated. He took one look at her before striding over to her bed, and gathering her up in his arms, and comforting her.

Lily couldn't remember when the dream ended and reality took over, but one minute she was in her bed at the Mansion, James comforting her in his flannel pyjamas, and then she was in her round bed and Hogwarts, James comforting her in a pair of sweat pants.  
"Shhh Lily love, it was just a dream."

"It..it..it was the same as before." She wailed, "it was the road and I knew what came next, but I didn't wanna see it again, I didn't wanna do it again." She broke down sobbing like a baby. James just held her tighter. Held her tightly until she fell asleep in his arms, broken and almost defeated.

But James knew she'd be up again in the morning fooling everyone. Well everyone except him.

**A/N: Ok, sorry for the wait with this one, I'll try and be quicker with the next one, but it could take a while soo, How bout if u review I will give u a sneak peek at the next chapter? Is it a deal? Anyway so the next chapter is the prank, I'm not very good at humour so it might be a little on the short side. I'll stop going on now, thanks for reading.**

**xoxoXOXOxoxo  
**


	4. Pranks and Robes

**A/N Chapter dedicated to LiliaGryffindor'sHeir376; My lovely BETA **

The students and staff of Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry were used to the Marauders pranks after 7 year. The welcome back feast every year since their 2nd year had featured a prank by the aforementioned. So to say that the school was surprised when the feast went off without a hitch was an understatement. They were shocked, waiting with baited breath for the traditional welcome back prank. When the night was finished and a prank hadn't happened everyone was bemused. The next morning at breakfast, everyone was jumpy and nervous thinking that the prank would be then after being lulled into a false sense of security. When Sunday morning came around, everyone started to relax, obviously thinking Lily was keeping them in check. And that night at dinner, not once was it given a second thought.

So no one was expecting anything when they entered the Great Hall on Monday morning before class. Except Dumbledore of course, but he knew he would enjoy this one, especially with Miss Evans involved.

The first half of breakfast went by the in the same fashion as the all other meals so far that term, loud, boisterous and generally chaotic, however neither hide nor hair was seen, nor heard of the Marauders or the chaos that was soon to follow.

Half way through breakfast, when everyone was gathered in the Great Hall the Marauders stood in the Great Hall talking.

"Ok, so we all know the protective spells?" James asked the group, they all nodded "Okay then."  
"So we all know the plan?" Lily took over; everyone nodded again, except for Peter who looked confused. "Ok, Peter just follow our lead," Lily and James then cast the protective spell on themselves and entered the Great Hall, closely followed by Sirius and Remus. Peter stood in the entrance hall grumbling to himself before entering the Great Hall as well.

The Marauders and Lily sat at the Gryffindor table casually talking and laughing like they did every meal. About 10 minutes after entering the hall Remus looked at James and nodded. James then got his wand and muttered a spell under his breath. The effect was almost instant. Every single person in the Great Hall's robes changed into that of the opposite sex. Pandemonium erupted in the hall, as everyone looked at each other and burst out laughing, before realizing they were attired exactly the same way.

James, Sirius and Remus burst out laughing, while Lily chuckled into her hand. They turned to Peter to find out why he wasn't amused – as he was usually the one laughing the hardest – Lily started laughing like the boys, while Remus had tears running down his face, and James and Sirius were rolling around on the ground,

In his irritation at Lily, Peter had forgotten to cast the protective spell on himself and as a result was sitting in his chair sulking in yellow robes, adorned with silver daisies.

While this was happening, many people ran out of the Great Hall to get changed back into their normal robes. They were all horrified when they realised they couldn't change. The Marauders had forced them to wear the horrible robes for a day!

Later that night the Marauders sat in the Heads common room discussing their favourite outfits of the day.

"Slughorn's pink and orange ones was the best." Remus was saying, envisioning their potion professor's short pink robes with orange butterflies.

"No way." Sirius yelled "Sniv… I mean Snape's were totally better." Snape's robes had been red, with a plunging neckline and gold flowers.

"Nuh, not at all." James cut in, "Minnie's were gorgeous." McGonagall's robes had been blue with green, stags, dogs, wolves and rats running around on them, which had puzzled all the students except for the Marauders.

"James never say gorgeous ever again." Lily smirked "Oh and you're all wrong" her smirk turned into a sweet smile "Dumbledore's was the most hilarious by a long shot.." The five of them had specially designed their headmaster's robes. They were hot pink. The words Sexy Beast were on the back, constantly flashing and changing colours, and on the front silver love hearts danced around. And he kept them on all day, even though he was probably the only one who could reverse the enchantment.

"Ok yea they were." Remus and James agreed.  
"Oh I dunno." Sirius chuckled "I think Petey here's were very spiffy", laughter rang out through the Heads Common Room.

_SomethingcomfortableSomethingcomfortable_

The next day Lily had Ancient Runes first period. James was the only one of the Marauders who also took the subject. Apart from James, two Ravenclaws, a Slytherin and Hufflepuff – and unluckily for Lily – Rachel and Sarah took the class.

The majority of the lesson went smoothly, as Lily managed to stay close to James, so the two Gryffindor girls didn't dare approach them. The two girls managed to corner Lily near the end of the lesson, when James had to ask Professor Babbling a question.

"So Lily," Rachel said sitting down in the chair James had just vacated "You and James seem pretty close."  
"Yea…yea we are." Lily said looking towards James, who had his back to her.  
"So, what happened?" Sarah asked sittingon James's desk.

"Excuse me?" Lily gave up on her frantic attempt to catch James's eye and turned her full attention to the two gossiping girls.

"What happened to make you stop hating James?" Sarah repeated, like she was talking to a three year old.  
"What makes you think I hated him?" Lily asked defensively.  
Rachel rolled her eyes "Oh,_ I hate James Potter, he's and arrogant, big headed toe rag!_ ring any bells?"

"I didn't hate James Potter!" Lily repeated louder this time.

"Fine whatever." Sarah said, sharing a look with Rachel "So, why did you arrive at the platform, flirting with the two most popular boys at school – who'd never want you by the way – instead of holding your mummy's hand like every other year?"

Meanwhile James had heard the whole exchange, but he thought Lily had a handle on it, at Sarah's last comment however – and the visible tears in Lily's eyes - he excused himself from the Professor and stormed over to where Lily was sitting. "Shut up!" he told Sarah viciously.

"Excuse me?" Sarah asked shocked, Potter was always charming around girls, and never talked down to them. "You heard me." He spat"and while you're at it- _piss off_. And don't bother us again." At another glare from James, Sarah scampered away.

Rachel opened her mouth to speak but at a third look from James, she retreated to her desk as well. "Oh Lily," James whispered enveloping the almost crying girl in a hug "It'll be okay."

Meanwhile, in the hallway Sarah and Rachel were arguing,  
"That was so unnecessary." Rachel yelled at Sarah, "Why are you being such a bitch?"  
"I am not." Sarah screamed back, "and even if I was that little whore deserved it, I mean she's fooling around with _both_ of those boys, and they deserve someone _way_ prettier and more outgoing."

"So that is what this is about? Your stupid little crush on James?" Rachel asked. When Sarah didn't reply Rachel had her answer. "Well I don't want anything to do with you or your games anymore."

And with that Rachael turned on her heel down the hall to try and find Lily.

**A/N: Again i think i will do the review and i'll give you a chapter 6 preview. Also if any one can guess what happened to Lily I'll give you an extra long chapter 7 preview. So there was chapter 5 what did u think? chapter 6 is getting BETA'd and will be up when i feel like it.**

**xoxoXOXOxoxo**


	5. New Friends and Good Friends

**A/N: Chapter Dedicated to mimimi213**

Despite all her trying, Rachel hadn't been able to approach Lily all week. Every time she saw her, Lily was either with a Marauder, or one mysteriously appeared whenever she went to speak to her, sending her a look that could kill a less determined person. Rachel was getting sick of all this. She just wanted to apologise to Lily for Sarah's comments. Rachel was also feeling very lonely, as all the other students didn't like Sarah's gossipy nature, so they didn't like her by association and Sarah was refusing to speak to Rachel since the outburst.

Sarah had finally had enough on the Saturday after class, when the Marauders had yelled at her to, 'leave Lily the frig alone!" at breakfast that morning and,'was she so thick she can't even take a hint.' Even calm and sensible Remus got a few insults in, while the normally 'try-hard' Peter just sat back and watched. Rachel just gave the boys a chilly look before turning on her heel and leaving the Great Hall, pausing at the door to make a rude gesture in the Marauders direction.

Now,later in the day she was standing outside the portrait to the Heads Common Room knowing it's location as her sister had been Head Girl three years previously. She had decided to go then as she knew James and Sirius were at Quidditch practice and from what she could tell Peter really didn't give Care. So that left Remus, who would be easiest to convince to let her see Lily.

Rachel took a deep breath before knocking on the lions set in the wall next to the portrait. She waited a minute before Lily opened the door.

"James did you forget the password aga…" Lily abruptly stopped when she realised who was at the door. "What do you want Rachel?" She asked in a deathly cold voice Rachel had only ever heard her use on James. A quite curse was heard from in the Common Room, and Rachel realised it was Remus.  
"Look Lily...I know I'm not your favourite person the moment.." Rachel stated,

"Got that right," Remus said from within the common room. "Oi, you shut up." She raised her voice so he could here her clearly before returning her gaze to Lily. 'I just wanted to say I'm sorry for what I said, I got too caught up in being Sarah's minion…"

"Wait a minute." Remus had come to the common room entrance now as well,"I thought she was your 'minion'?"

"Yea well, she said she didn't want to take the credit or be in charge so I could, but now I kinda see that everyone thought I was the bitchy one and her the follower, she did it so I would get all the hatred not her." Rachel said bitterly, "Anyway,her plan worked, now no one in the school will talk to me coz they think I'm a gossiping bitch." Remus and Lily just stared at her. "So again, I'm sorry, uh...bye then."she said awkwardly.

Rachel turned on her heel to leave. "Wait." Lily called out after her. Rachel slowly turned on her heel to face her voice. "Is she really the bitchy one?" Lily asked in a small voice, as if not to offend her.

"Yea…yea she was." Rachel smiled sadly, "I've actually always admired you, thought you were really strong and let nothing faze you, but Sarah had this HUGE crush on James and was always jealous of you, and I was in too deep to back out." Lily and Remus both looked surprised at this revelation. "But she went to far with what she said on Monday." looking at them with such ferocity for them to know the truth of her actions, Lily felt a surge of compassion toward Rachel.

The two standing in the portrait hole shared a look, before Remus nodded and re-entered the Common Room, leaving just Lily and Rachel.

"I'm really sorry you lost your only friend because of me." Lily said to Rachel. "Hey," Rachel said softly "She wasn't worth it, she wasn't even a good friend."

"Do…do you wanna come in and talk?" Lily asked her hesitantly.

"Yea sure."Rachel smiled at her.

James and Sirius entered the Common room that night to a sight that shocked them. Rachel and Lily were sitting curled up on the couch facing each other, and Remus sat on the floor between them. All three were laughing at a story Rachel was telling.

"So then he goes to my friend Charlie, 'Is there a Mirror in Your Pocket, Coz I can See Myself…"

"WHAT is going on in here?" James thundered.

"Rach was just telling us a story about these guys that were hitting on her and her friend." Lily laughed, while clearly giving James a look that said, 'don't you dare say anything'.

"But..." Sirius started, but James elbowed him in the ribs. "Then don't stop on our account." James said smoothly, moving to sit in one of the armchairs.

"Anyway, so then the other one, got down on the floor and started doing sit-ups, then when Charlie asks him what he's doing he replies 'If I do sit-ups then maybe Rachel will think I'm Pretty." Everyone in the room(burst out laughing, even if Sirius did so grudgingly, "Then, he goes to me 'I'm gonna get your beautiful face tattooed on my chest' and when we just look at him he adds 'and your gorgeous arse tattooed on my back." No one could control their laughter anymore, Lily and Remus had tears streaming down their face, while James was clutching his stomach and Sirius was rolling around on the floor.

"You think THAT was bad." Lily said when she had recovered enough to speak, "How about the time James…" and the five of them sat in the common room through the night talking, laughing and bonding. And Lily knew that Rachel was going to be a great friend.

_SomethingcomfortableSomethingcomfortable_

Sarah Harvey immediately knew something was wrong when she woke up on Monday morning. She could feel it in her bones that her natural beauty had somehow been tarnished and she had a feeling who was responsible for it. She stormed up to the mirror and gasped in shock. This was not what she was expecting. Her beautiful honey coloured wavy hair had been shaved off. "RACHEL KING!" She screamed.

"The look on her face was PRICLESS" Rachel told Lily and the Marauders as she slipped into her now permanent seat next to Remus at the Gryffindor table. "She immediately suspected me." Rachel giggled, "Even though it technically wasn't."  
"Yea," James grinned at her, "Even if we get totally busted it was sooo worth it."  
"What did you do with the hair?" Lily asked curiously.  
"Well," James stated "We decided Sluggy needed a new wig, so we made one for him."

The 6 students were all giggling still when a still bald Sarah walked up to them.

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO?" She screamed at Rachel "NOTING I TRY WILL MAKE IT GROW BACK!" She turned 30 different shades of red.

"And You," She turned to the Marauders and pointed accusingly "I can't believe you let this bitchy gossip queen into you close knit ranks," When she was ignored she tried another approach "Your standards are so slipping, The most exclusive club in Hogwarts has suddenly let in a know-it-all Muggle born, and a Bitchy, gossiping Half Blood." By this time everyone in the Great Hall had stopped eating and turned towards them., "My how the mighty have fallen."

"Shut up Sarah." Lily calmly told her, putting her hand on James' knee to calm him down.

"Yea, I can't believe the Marauders let that gossipy bitch into their ranks, Next thing you know all your secrets will be spilled to the world." An angry 6th year stood up from the Ravenclaw table and there was a murmur of agreement around the Great Hall. Sarah smiled smugly at Rachel, but her smile faltered when an unfazed Rachel stood up.

"You may think I'm the school bitch, and frankly - I don't really care what you think, but honestly, - you believe _Sarah Harvey_?" The Great Hall grew quiet. "Believe what you want, but I'm not the one that started the rumour that Varly slept with the whole Hufflepuff Quidditch team." The Ravenclaw that had stood up turned her anger to Sarah.

"In fact I'm sure everyone in this hall has been burned by something Sarah said, I admit I followed her but not anymore."

Swiftly, The Marauders and Lily rose to their feet, and fired a rainbow of spells into the air. Sarah's voice filled the room, rapidly a montage of all the bitchy things she ever said filled the room. When it was over the 6 Gryffindors left the great hall, leaving Sarah to face the violent and enraged students.

_SomethingcomfortableSomethingcomfortable_

"Lily," James hesitantly asked her as the two sat in their common room doing their homework later that night.  
"Yes James?" she asked wearily, guessing where this conversation was going.  
"Why did you open up to Rachel so quickly?" Lily was shocked, she thought he would be angry at her for her new friendship.

"Well I guess I just trusted her, and I need a female friend."  
"Yea I suppose you do." James said, shocking Lily with his response again, "I mean look how close you were to Izzy and Alice, you were so worried in the holidays and at their graduation because you thought you would be alone this year."

Lily gapped at him, "b-but…how?"  
"How did I know that?" Lily mutely nodded, "Lily, for me you wear your heart on you sleeve, most people say you're hard to read but the only person who I can read better is Sirius," Lily snorted, "Yea, and anyone can read him … well, all he thinks about is food and girls."

James looked soberly at Lily, "Look Lily we all care about you, even Peter and especially Sirius, we just don't want you to get hurt by Rachel."  
"I know, and I appreciate how much you guys care for me, but I think I can trust Rachel."

"Yea I know that, and Remus does to. In fact he didn't even want us 'guarding you' as he called it during the week, but it's going to take Sirius some time to get used to it," Lily nodded again, "Why don't you talk to him tomorrow?"

"Ok," she said quietly "I'll do that," With that the both returned to their homework.  
The next morning Sirius was sitting on the couch in the Head's Common Room as Lily got up. "Lily." He nodded to her coldly.

"Sirius…" She said hesitantly before going to sit on the couch next to him "Are you mad at me?"  
"Oh no, why on earth would I be mad at you?"  
"Please Sirius, I need a girlfriend, and Rachel might be that."

"What's wrong with us, aren't we good enough for you?" Sirius turned to her with a strange combination of bitterness and pleading in his eyes and voice. "Of course you are," Lily soothed and gently lay her hand on his arm "But I need_ girl _friends." When he opened his mouth to interrupt she shushed him "Girl friends who are here, not at home getting on with their lives."

"But why _Rachel_?" Sirius asked, "She made your life miserable all of year 5 and 6, and don't say she didn't because I noticed." Lily visibly paled, "James and Remus are all for this new friendship but they didn't notice how uncomfortable they made you, they didn't walk in on them yelling and screaming at you."

"Yea, but it wasn't Rachel, it was all Sarah, and Rachel apologised." Lily regained her voice.  
"But how do you know she isn't just pretending?" Sirius asked|.  
"Enough Sirius Black!" Lily said coldly and quietly as she stood up.

"It's in the past and I forgive her. And as for why her, let me ask you a question Sirius. Why did you pick James and Remus, because you three were as thick as thieves not three hours into that train ride, never having met before."

"It just felt right." Sirius mumbled ashamed. "I felt like i could trust them with my lives, and that they'd always have my back.

"Exactly it felt right, and I feel like I can trust Rachel, that is the end of the matter," She turned on her heel to stomp out of the common room when Sirius' voice stopped her.

"Fine I'm sorry Lily," he raised his voice, "It's just James cares for you, Remus cares for you, and…I care about you." He said the last part so quietly Lily had to strain to hear him., "We just don't want to see you hurt."

"She won't hurt me Sirius. She won't hurt_ Us" _Lily said walking over to him hugging him, "I promise."

**A/N: On my profile there is a link to my polyvore with my rough chapter art things, please check them out.**

**Ok Again read and review the next chapter is the one your all waiting for, so if you review you'll get a little snippet again, and this will be a GOOD snippet. again if anyone else can guess wat happens to Lily you get a bigger snippet. Also _theadventuresofjamesandsirius _is really close, but not quite there. Thanks to all my loyal readers, even those that don't review.**

**xoxoXOXOxoxo**


	6. Breaking down

**A/N: Sorry it took so long, me and my BETA had heaps of homework at stuff.**

The evening of Friday November 11th found the Marauders, minus Peter, Lily and Rachel hanging around in the Heads Common room. They were sitting in what had become their regular seating plan. Remus was sitting in one armchair and Sirius was seated in the other, Rachel sat up one end of the sofa while Lily and James curled up together up on the other end. Today Sirius and James where telling an embarrassing story about Remus, much to his annoyance.

"So anyway, we run around to the back of the house, wands drawn to see what all the racket was about-." Sirius was saying.

"-And we find Remus running around his back yard trying to catch this little rabbit." James finished before everyone, bar Remus, started to laugh.

"Oh ha-ha," he quipped. "It's not like you could catch that furry little problem either."sticking his tongue out at them

"Wait a minute," Rachel said realising something, "I thought your furry little problem was your … um, condition."

"Yes, well." Remus tried to speak over James and Sirius' laughter, "That's where – Oh would you to please put a sock in it – anyway what was I saying, oh yes right, that's where we got the idea from, if anyone ever asks I really do have a little pest of a bunny."

The five of them sat in a comfortable silence for a while. James noticed Lily staring blankly into the fire, and pulled her closer to him. Lily smiled sadly up at James before de-tangling herself.

"Goodnight everyone." she told them quietly, giving each of them a hug. When she reached James, he quietly whispered something in her ear, before she looked at him in appreciation and nodded. She gave them all an obviously forced smile before leaving them in the common room.

As soon as she was out of earshot Sirius turned to the group with a worried look on his face, "Will she be all right tomorrow?" he asked James anxiously.

James solemnly shook his head, "Probably not."

"What?" Rachel asked the three very serious boys, "What happens tomorrow?"

"It's been four months tomorrow." Remus told her gently after a few minutes., "I mean she's been gloomy on the 12th of every month,". He said to James hopefully, "What's to say she won't just be the same as every other time?"

Again, James shook his head, "No,it will be different tomorrow. She has been miserable all week, worse than any other time, _and_ it'll have been four months tomorrow, that's a quarter of a year already." He gave them time to digest it before continuing, " If that didn't prove it will be hard for her, just think about what she'll be like in 8 months time? A whole year since it happened? She'll be hurting. She'll be hurting real bad. When I just asked her if she wanted me to check up on her tonight she said yes. And i will I promise I'm going to be there for her, every step of the way, help her get better

The Common Room was filled with shocked silence.

_SomethingcomfortableSomethingcomfortable_

The 12th of November found Lily Evans curled into her doona, a picture clutched to her chest and bawling her eyes out. Luckily, she didn't have any nightmares last night, but she knew they would be ten times worse tonight - because that's how it always was. All of her friends had come to try and coax her out of her room, but to no avail. Izzy and Alice had even sent her letters to tell her to move on. The letters lay un-opened were the owls had dropped them just inside her window. In fact, the only person who hadn't come up to comfort her or try and cheer her up was James, and Lily was feeling oddly disappointed about that.

After a few hours, Lily lost all awareness and just wallowed in her misery, sobbing her heart out blocking out all outside noise and movement. Finally, she became aware of somebody stroking her hair, soothingly – and instinctively she knew it was James. It felt soothing to Lily and she calmed down for a second, forgetting about her problems, before it all came crashing back ten times worse.

She was wailing and sobbing so hard now that she could hardly breathe. She didn't realise that James had picked her up, gently holding her to his chest nor did she realise he had descended from her staircase and was now ascending his. She did however realise when he gently placed her on his bed, before climbing up next to her. She lay on James' bed while he rubbed calming circles in her back.

"Hey...hey it's ok love." He soothed in his deep voice, "You're safe."

"But…b-but she isn't" Lily wailed. She sat up so she was facing James. "She was my mum, she was supposed to die peacefully in a hospital bed, not be murdered by a psychopathic wizard because I wouldn't join him."

James wordlessly looked at Lily, "It's all my fault, if I wasn't a witch then Mummy would still be alive, or if I had just joined him or maybe if I hadn't been at Izzy's then maybe he would have gotten me instead…" She trailed off unable to continue.

"Hey." James said sternly, "Look at me." When she refused to meet his gaze he gently lifted her chin so she was looking him in the eye, "It's not your fault you're a witch and there is nothing you can do about it, you and I both know you're to good and kind-hearted to join such an evil bastard, and if you had been there…" James took a shaky breath, "Well he would have killed both of you, and a lot of people love you Lily, they wouldn't have been able to handle your death."

"Like who?" Lily burst out, "I'm just a know-it-all mudblood"

"Don't you dare say that." James growled at her, causing her to jump a little, "Lots of people care about you." He said softer this time, "like Izzy, Alice, Remus, Rachel, Sirius, my Parents," he gulped a bit, "and me. Lily - if something happened to you, I don't know what I, or any of us would do, so please for all our sakes don't wish your death upon yourself."

They sat in silence for a minute before Lily suddenly threw herself into James' arms., "I'm so sorry. I really don't want to die, but it does feel like it's my entire fault." James continued rubbing her back, "Hey its fine, dad says it's natural to feel guilty about death."

"Yea I know." Lily tried to laugh. "But it's just; do you think she's angry at me?" She suddenly asked James, startling him with the question. "No, why would she be angry with you?"

"Because I don't think of her enough, because I am having so much more fun with you guys than I ever had when she was alive and maybe because most of the time I forget that she's gone." James pulled Lily closer to him, and ceased his circle rubbing as she started to howl again.

"Lily- she's dead." He tried to think about what he wanted to say, "Most people would say she is looking down on you wanting you to be happy, but I don't believe that." James sighed, this was coming out wrong. He tried again, "Yes, if she was alive she'd want you to be happy, and yes she would want you to move on but not forget her. But she's not alive, she's dead and you're going to have to deal with that, it's not a crime to laugh and smile, nor a crime to yell and weep."

Lily smiled at him and he sighed, glad he'd gotten through to her. She wrapped her arms firmly around his waist before burying her head in his chest. Half an hour later when Sirius and Rachel went to go and check on them they found the two fast asleep, wrapped in each other's arms.

_SomethingcomfortableSomethingcomfortable_

If Lily had thought James's presence was going to stop the dreams she would have been sadly disappointed. Lily Evans however knew that no matter where she was the nightmare would plague her for the rest of her life.

Lily walked up the driveway to the house she shared with her mother since her father had died of cancer in her third year and her sister had moved out the summer before. It was cold and windy so Lily rushed up to the door fumbling for the keys in her pocket. It wasn't anything like in horror movies, she didn't feel anything deep in her bones, the windows were shut and the lights on, the door wasn't hanging off its hinges. Everything was like it always was - in perfect order. It was late so Lily didn't bother calling out to her mum, she knew her mum would be upstairs reading, like she always was. She walked up to her mother's bedroom and knocked on the door. When she received no answer she thought her mother had fallen asleep reading. She quietly opened the door so as not to wake her mother and went to put the book she thought would be in her mother's hand away.

That's when she realised there was something wrong. Her mother wasn't snoring loudly as she always did; in fact she looked eerily calm. The second thing that Lily didn't immediately notice was that her mother's red bed shirt was wet. Hands shaking) she undid her mothers night-shirt and recoiled in horror. Carved onto her mother's chest was the grinning face of His mark. She ran to the bathroom to be sick. and that's when she heard it, the front door opening. She had dropped her wand on the kitchen counter and was now defenceless. In a moment of Panic she scampered into the shower, drew the curtains. She quivered and moaned in the cold, damp shower. She wished the Death Eater would just get it over with and kill her.

Then she heard it, the bathroom door creaked open and in walked a hooded figure. She squeaked in shock, giving her hiding spot away. The death eater slowly drew back the shower curtain. He raised his wand and started to shout the killing curse, when suddenly he kneeled over -stunned. Lily groggily looked at her saviour. "James?" she asked weakly before darkness slipped over her.

Like all the other times, Lily woke from her dream sweating. But this time it was different, this time she was warm instead of chilled to the bone, this time she wasn't terrified, this time she was lying in the arms of James Potter

And this time she wouldn't let it affect her.

**A/N: Okey dokey, that was probably the chapter you were waiting for, so here it is. If i've been gone to long with no readers i will kinda keep it slow, but if you guys are still writing it i promise i will speed it up. Chapter 8 is with my BETA, and if u guys still like it, i can write chapter 9 during the week.**

**xx Lilybet  
**


	7. Sirius the Hero

Chapter 7.

"SIRIUS BLACK!" Lily's voice thundered through the heads common room early one Saturday morning.  
"Wha…What?" Sirius fell off the couch he had spent the night on.  
"Why on _Earth_ are you sleeping on the couch?"  
"Because I fell asleep here?" Sirius was puzzled as to why she was so angry.

"Would you to please keep it down." James mumbled groggily as he walked into the middle of their argument "It _is_ only 8 o' clock on Saturday morning so if you could shout instead of screaming that would be much appreciated."

"Well," Lily turned to him, "I wouldn't be arguing with your 'friend' here if he hadn't passed out drunk on our couch last night."

"Lily," James tried to soothe, "Yes he passed out on our couch, last night." He turned to glare at his best friend "But that doesn't mean you have to wake up the whole castle this early on a Saturday morning."

"Well the castle deserves to be woken up for putting up with this dick for so long." Lily growled dangerously. Sirius burst out laughing at the lame comeback while James bit his lip to keep in the growing chuckle.

"Whatever." Lily stomped her foot, "Let's just go to breakfast." She stormed out of the common room. James and Sirius looked at each other "what on earth was that about, Mate?" Sirius asked his friend "I have no clue," James replied "but to prevent it happening again, please refrain from passing out drunk on my couch in the future."

"I wasn't drunk." Sirius protested.  
"HURRY UP!" Lily shrieked from the hallway.  
"Coming." James yelled as he and Sirius shared a look before scampering after the furious girl.

Rachel and Remus were already at the Gryffindor table when Lily and the two Boys arrived. "Good Morning to you." Remus said as the three took the usually seats.

"Morning." Sirius sung, while James nodded and Lily angrily grunted.

"Well good morning sunshine." Rachel sung at Lily "Glad to see someone is so cheery today." Lily grudgingly let out a laugh, before reaching for a piece of toast.

"So what are our plans for this fine Saturday?" Sirius asked a little bit later.  
"Well," Lily said getting an evil glint in her eyes "You could help me hang the curtains in my room."

"NOOOOOO." Sirius howled "NOT THE CURTAINS. ANYTHING BUT THE CURTAINS."

Everyone in the Great Hall turned to stare at Sirius as he had a mental breakdown.

"Nothing to see here, everyone go back to eating." Remus told everyone, as James slapped Sirius "Mate, Shut Up!" While Lily sat back in her seat giggling.

"What's going on?" Rachel whispered to Lily. "Well the thing is," Lily giggled back "Sirius has this really irrational fears of curtains, and no one has any clue why."

Rachel looked at Sirius weirdly before turning back to Lily "But what about last year when they turned all the curtains in the school into rainbow colours that sang rude and annoying songs as you walked past, If he had a fear of curtains how did he manage to even plan that let alone do it."

Lily sobered up considerably "Well I don't really think I should be telling you this, but I will anyway." Lily paused and Rachel impatiently motioned for her to continue. Lily did so reluctantly "One day during the holidays, Sirius cried out in his sleep 'Harry!' frantically, he woke up shaken, and well hasn't approached drapes since." The owls had arrived as Lily was talking and her daily prophet was dropped in front of her.

"Well that's, odd." Rachel was trying not to giggle, "Hey, you don't know, remember!" Lily warned her before opening the daily prophet.

"Oh dear not another one." Lily quietly _said_ Her four friends stopped talking and turned their attention to her.

"Another what?" Sirius asked cluelessly as everyone else stared at her gravely. "An attack you moron," Remus told him. "By that Voldemort nutter." He explained at Sirius' puzzled look. "Oh."

"Where was it this time?" James asked Lily

"Tinworth," she replied quietly "The Young family was attacked all of them were killed, and the neighbouring houses were also attacked, there was one other victim. A young man that is so badly burnt he is unidentifiable. Other residents have been taken to St. Mungo's with varying degrees of injuries." Lily read solemnly from the paper in front of her.

Rachel who was listening as intently turned white and let out a small moan before standing up from her chair and sprinting out of the hall.

"What was that about?" James asked Lily in concern. Remus answered for Lily.

"Rachel's family lives in Tinworth. The Youngs' were her neighbors."

_SomethingcomfortableSomethingcomfortable_

There was shocked silence for a while before Sirius finally spoke. "What are we going to do?" Lily mutely shook her head while Remus shrugged.

James decided to take charge. "Ok Remus, make sure that no rumours start about this and stay down here. Lily, go to the kitchen and tell the elves that James needs the kit. I'll owl dad, see if he can identify Rachel's family and tell me where they are."

"What about meeee?" Sirius whined, "What do I do?"

"You can go and find Rachel."

"But why me?" Sirius asked confused "Why not Lily?"

"Because, you have to." Was all James said before leaving, Lily and Remus in his wake.

It didn't take Sirius very long to find Rachel using the Marauders map. She was at the astronomy tower. He hesitated for a moment deciding what to do. Did James mean for him to simply find Rachel or was he supposed to go after her as well? If he did go after her what was he supposed to do? He wasn't James, who always knew what to say, who could comfort anyone, he was Sirius 'Foot-in Mouth' Black. He made his decision, he would go find Rachel, It's what he would want if the roles where reversed.

Rachel sat on the floor of the astronomy tower, her back to the wall and wept. She wept for the unknown fate of her family, She wept for the home she'd always known. And she wept for Kelly Young, her child hood best friend whose life had been cut so tragically short. After a while she heard the trapdoor but she didn't have the energy to turn her head, she hoped it was a first year who would leave upon the sight of her. She had no such luck. It was Josh Sculley a 7th year Slytherin. "What do we have her?" he mocked her "Did someone's Daddy get hurt? Did Someone's home get destroyed? Did Someone's best friend die?" Rachel let out a whimper. "AWW, did you not know that?" he asked her "Did you not know your dad's in St. Mungo's fighting for his life?" he cackled "Well now you do."

"SHUT UP SCULLEY!" A new voice bellowed as Sirius entered the room.

"Aww well if it isn't little mister runaway, come to protect the half-blood bitch." Josh said cockily, but his nervousness showed through his darting brown eyes.

"Sculley I know for a fact you yourself are half-blood, so scoot away, before I kindly do it for you."

"Whatever, like I'd wanna be in company like you anyway, Black." He spat before strutting out of the room.

"You ok?" Sirius asked Rachel, his tone now gentle.

"Like you care." Rachel said, "You don't even like me. I bet you only came after me because the others' told you to."

"Hey, what makes you say that?" Sirius asked slightly guiltily – James _had_ told him to come, but it wasn't like it was against his will or anything.

"I know you didn't want me to join in your guys group. I mean you never sit near me, or talk to me when the others aren't around." She mumbled.

"Hey, you're right. At first I didn't want you joining the group, but it's nothing personal. I just didn't like the way you acted before. But you've been such a good thing for Lily – for all of us – that it's impossible to dislike you." He told her sincerely lowering himself to the ground next to her. At his words she burst into tears again. "Hey, what's wrong?" he asked her concerned he'd said something wrong. She didn't answer him, just buried her head into his shoulder and continued to cry. He tentatively wrapped his arms around her waist, and was rewarded with her arms tightening around his neck. He smiled into her hair as she cried herself to sleep.

_SomethingcomfortableSomethingcomfortable_

"Your family are all fine." James told Rachel later that evening "Your brother had minor burns, but was fixed up in an instant." Rachel sighed in relief at his words.

"Thank you guys." She told the marauders all gathered in their normal hang out zone the Heads Common Room.

"Hey don't worry about it." James said

"Yeah." Lily chimed in "You all helped me so much, I'm just glad I could return the favour."

"I just know I'm gonna have nightmares tonight." Rachel shuddered despite the warmth from the fire.

"Hey, I forgot to mention." James said "When I was in Dumbledore's office today he said that he 'knew Miss King had been through a lot' and that you could all sleep in here tonight."

"How is that going to work?" Remus wondered aloud, "There are only two beds, yours and Lily's."

"Well he was going to get the house elves to conjure us up some beds." As he spoke 3 beds appeared in the common room. "I guess me and James are sleeping in our own beds." Lily mused.

"Guess so." James said.

"Well it's been a busy day so I'm going to turn in early." Lily told them all "Goodnight." They said their goodnights and James and Lily climbed up the staircase to their rooms.

Remus left to have a shower leaving Rachel and Sirius alone in the common room. "Thank you." She quietly told him, refusing to meet his eye.

"No problem," he told her nonchalantly. I'm just glad that you're ok and dealing with this good." Rachel smiled shyly at him, a smile that he returned fully.

When Remus finally re-enter the common room he found the two lying fast asleep curled up on the couch.

_ZOMG SO SO Sorry about the uber long wait, I'm back at school so it's hard and the inspiration ran dry, but i promise i will keep updating, i have the story all mapped out. Is anyone still intrested in this? because if you are I'll make a bigger effort._

_X's and O's  
_


	8. Holiday Blues and Balls

**A/N: Finally next chapter, not such a long wait **

Lily sat curled up in a little ball staring into the fire. No tears were falling and she didn't feel sad, she didn't feel angry, not even guilt. She felt lonely.

It was the 12th December 5 months since her mother's death, a fact she was highly aware of. After her talk with James she had started to let go of all her guilt and anger, she still missed her mum and the nightmares still continued but they were bearable, especially with all the support of her friends. Now, what she felt was loneliness

Term was finishing in a few days; everyone all over the castle was ecstatic about the break. Everyone that is, except for Lily. Everyone else had somewhere to go, a family that loved them - or in Sirius' case a foster family; But Lily had no one. She knew for sure Petunia didn't want her, Alice had just got engaged to Frank and she didn't want to intrude. Rachel's father was sick so she couldn't go home with them, and she didn't want to be a burden to them anymore.

That's all she was, Lily thought to herself, a burden to everyone around her. They all gave her so much support and what did she give them in return? Absolutely nothing. She felt a tear trickle slowly down her face but made no move to wipe it away.

That was the way she was when James found her a little while later.

"Lily?" He asked her softly coming to sit beside her and laying a hand on her back. "What's the matter?"

Lily was quiet and still for a few minutes, James would have thought her asleep apart from her quiet sobs.

"Lily?"

"I'm sorry." She finally managed to mutter

"What are you sorry for?" James asked bewildered

"Being such a burden." She whispered.

"Oh Lily," James sighed. Picking her up and placing her in his lap. "Don't ever think of yourself that way ever again, what even made you say that?"

"You do so much for me; all of you do." She mumbled into his shirt "and what do I give you in return? Nothing."

"Lily, that's not true at all."

"Yes it is."

"Lily Evans." James barked, scaring Lily a little "You're not a burden, and you do so much for all of us."

"Like what?" Lily whispered heartbroken. James realised with a start she truly couldn't see what she did for each of them.

"You help us all with homework, make us laugh, you're kind to everyone; even the first years and the slytherins, your understanding, brave, compassionate and so non judgmental."

"Non Judgmental?" Lily half laughed. "I'm not brave, I'm scared of everything for god's sake, I have nightmares every night."

"Lily, anyone in your situation would have nightmares, being brave isn't being fearless, its being scared but doing it anyway."

"I'm not understanding or compassionate." She muttered

"Are you serious?" James asked her, and Lily nodded her head soberly.

"OK let's try something else." James said, "What have you done for everyone, maybe this will convince you of your worth."

"Nothing." Lily muttered.

"Lily Evans, I'm going to try and help you understand why I- We love you, please don't interrupt okay?" She nodded and he continued

"Let's see, You're the older sister Sirius never had, he trusts you completely and tells you everything, doesn't he?" Lily smiled at the thought and nodded.

"Remus, you didn't react when he told you about his problem, you didn't flinch, and even though you knew you treated him no different. Even Sirius and myself treated him different, not bad, but just different."

"I suppose so." Lily said cheering up a bit.

"Rachel, well your Rachel's first proper friend and equal she respects and loves you so much for that." Lily smiled, "Okay fine I see your point,"

"They all love you." James told her softly

"And what about you." She asked him. When she got no reply she looked up at him from her place in his lap and saw him staring into space.

She sat patiently for a minute until he began to talk. "You've helped me to grow up, and as a person, to knuckle down and to work and be respectful. You've helped me to be compassionate and understand. And so much more."

"More?" She asked him hesitantly

"You'll have to figure that out on your own." He told her, flicking her nose.

They were silent for a while before James snapped his fingers. "Crap, I can't believe I forgot. Mum will skin me alive."

"What did you forget?" Lily asked him curiously

"To ask you to the ball." He replied matter of factly

"What Ball?"

"The annual Potter Christmas Ball."

"And what exactly would that be?"

"Every year on Christmas Eve mother hosts a huge ball in the ball room of the manor – it barely holds everyone she invites." Lily was awed as she thought of how many people that would be.

"The thing is she makes it like a muggle masquerade ball, the women wear huge gowns and the men wear suits, we even have masks – though most people take them off almost as soon as they arrive."

"Wow, sounds like fun." Lily breathed envisaging it.

"It is." James agreed

"But, how does everyone dress right? From the experience I've had wizards botch up muggle clothing." Lily was confused

"It's pretty easy, mum and a group of her friends take big expeditions into muggle shops and help point people in the right direction, and if their not dressed right, their turned away."

"Isn't that a bit harsh?" Lily asked

"Nah everyone is used to it by now, and anyway they all go shopping with her, she makes sure of it so they have no excuse."

"Well it sounds amazing." Lily sighed, thinking of huge fluffy gowns.

"It is." James said "So how would you like to come." He asked her

"WOULD I EVER." She shrieked throwing herself at him "You're the BEST."

_Somethingcomfortablesomethingcomfortable_

"LILLLLLLLLY." Sirius yelled as he barrelled into the common

"SIRIUS." Lily replied, removing herself from James' lap where she had been helping him get his holiday homework done before they had to leave in the morning. Remus and Rachel suddenly entered the common room as well, panting.

"What happened to you guys?" James asked, also getting up from the couch.

"Sirius had a bright idea, so we had to run here from the kitchen's, just so he could ask Lily, if she would let him." Remus grumbled

"Which she won't." Rachel pipped up.

"Sirius." Lily turned to him, "Is this another of your hair brained schemes that's going to make my skin purple for a week." Everyone else in the room laughed at the memory, though Sirius almost visibly shrunk.

"No Miss."

"So what do you want then?" She asked him.

"To give you a make-over." Sirius chimed whilst jumping up and down and clapping.

"Rachel's right, why on EARTH would you think I'd let YOU give me a make-over." Sirius visibly deflated "Sorry." Lily immediately felt guilty.

"What exactly did you want to do to me?" she asked him hesitantly

"Cute your hair, do your make-up and find you an outfit." Sirius started to bounce again.

"I dunno…" She said

"Come on Lily it'll be fun." James coaxed "you can wash the make-up off and cast a re growing harm on your hair, you don't even have to put the outfit on if you don't want to."

"Oh alright then." Lily consented "But if I look slutty, evil, trampy or like a hobo, your both DEAD, got it?"

"Yes Miss." The boys coursed

Two hours later lily sat in front of the covered vanity in her room, waiting for Sirius to finish cutting here hair.

"Oh my gosh, honey your going to look gorgeous." He told her in a high-pitched American accent.

"You've been watching way to much queer eye for straight guy." James groaned from where he was lying on Lily's bed "Way to much."

"I have not." Sirius said, in the same voice.

"Yes, Padfoot, You have." Remus joined the conversation from the armchair.

The boys started to argue, and Lily shared a look with Rachel, where she sat at the desk chair.

"Guys, could we please have this conversation when Sirius ISN'T waving around a pair of scissors, and about to cut my hair, I don't trust him at the best of times." Lily finally yelled. All three boys looked stunned for a minute before Remus and James started to howl with laughter. Sirius just stood there looking offended "Don't you trust me lilykins?" He pouted, making Sirius and Remus laugh even harder – Remus fell of his chair with a humph.

"No Sirius I trust you, I just don't trust you with my hair."

"Oh ok, fair enough." Sirius said, before getting back to cutting her hair.

He was done half an hour later. Lily sat, nervously playing with her hands, trying to judge a reaction of anyone else's face. Even Sirius had his face sculpted into perfect seriousness. "Just show me you guys." She said, taking a deep breath. James flicked his wand and the mirror became visible again. Lily gasped in shock.

"Oh my god Sirius, I didn't think you could do it." She breathed, staring at her shoulder hair. It looked good, granted she would probably grow her hair back by Christmas, but even so it would be funny to see everyone's reaction. She then looked at the make-up Sirius had put on her, subtle but fan and flirty, without the bright red lips girls needed to put on her. "Wow Sirius you know more about make-up then most girls do." She told him as he blushed.

Finally she looked down at her outfit. He had put her in a black pencil waisted skirt and a white tank top, with a black fitted trench coat over the top. "Are you sure your straight?" she asked him in disbelief.

"Yes, darling." He answered going back to the horrendous accent from before.

"Well know that your done with my hair I can say this. I AGREE WITH JAMES."

**A/N: Okay another chapter, chapter 10 in the works and the second chapter of SF is being BETA'd. I added the last bit because i thought the last 3 chapters were to heavy. Do you like them and want me to continue them or are they to out of place? Okay REVIEW and you get a SNEAK PEAK of the NEXT CHAPTER. Keep watching.**

**x's and o's  
**


	9. Returning Home

**A/N: Sorry for the wait. More at the note at the bottom**

"How come Dumbledore lets us Floo again?" Lily asked James as the two of them and Sirius stood outside the statue in front of the headmaster's office.  
"Because James' parents are special, and have lots of money. Plus they owe Dumbledore, if you know what I mean" Sirius winked trying to keep a straight face.  
"Yea, okay whatever Sirius." Lily said turning her back to him  
"Because mum and dad like to keep an eye on me. They can't pick me up from the station because of arrangements for the party and they don't want anything to happen to me." James said solemnly. Lily had no clue what he was talking about keeping safe - he was one of the best wizards in his year - but at a small shake of Sirius' head and the look on James' face stopped her from asking. Maybe later.

She was saved from having to make any comment by the movement of the Gargoyle. The three stepped onto the staircase. James and Sirius were holding Lily's trunk for her – they had enough of their own clothes at the mansion already.

When they knocked on the door they were surprised to hear Professor McGonagall invite them in instead of Dumbledore.

"So Minnie, where's Dumbleydore?" Sirius asked her straight away.  
"He is away on business Mr. Black." She said, not paying any attention to the nickname. All of the teachers were used to his stupid nicknames after seven years.  
"Are you ready then?" She asked them, gesturing to the roaring fire place. When the three students nodded she continued. "Who's going first then?"  
"I will." James volunteered stepping forward "And I'll take Lily's trunk." He shrunk Lily's trunk so that it fit into his hand before stepping into Dumbledore's fireplace and grabbing a handful of the floo powder Professor McGonagall offered him. "Potter Manor." He said loudly before he disappeared in a bright green flame.  
"Okay Miss. Evans will go next; I need to talk to you Mr. Black." McGonagall told them when the fire's colour returned to a warm red. Lily stepped up to the mantel and took a deep breath as she grabbed a handful of floo powder – Being a muggle born the thought of travelling through a fire place was bizarre and foreign, coupled with the fact she wasn't used to it meant floo was NOT her favourite way to travel.

"Potter Manor." She said, swirling around through the fire places before flying out of the fireplace in the living room of the Potter Manor and knocking James over.  
"Sorry." She blushed as he laughed at her.  
"No Problem." He said through his chuckles. She quickly climbed off of him and he stood up as well.  
"Where's Sirius?" He asked her as he returned her trunk to its normal size.  
"McGonagall wanted to talk with him about something." Lily shrugged nonchalantly. James' eyes clouded over for a second, she wouldn't have noticed except for the fact she had happened to glance at him in the exact moment. A second later he shook his head and his eyes cleared.  
"Come on; let's go put this in your room." He said cheerfully, gesturing towards the trunk.

__

The room Lily was staying in was exactly the same as she remembered it from the summer before without all of her belongings. It was double the size of her Bedroom at Hogwarts with red walls and a white carpet. The bed that sat in the centre of the wall was bigger than any bed she had ever seen. Against the other walls were various bookshelves, desks and arm chairs.

"It's the same." Lily said in wonder flopping back on the bed.  
"Yea...How else do you think it would be?" James asked her.  
"Well didn't your mum say that the room changed for each guest that stayed in it, so I expected it to be different." She explained to him.

"Yea she did say that." James told her sitting next to her on the bed "But didn't she also say when someone claimed ownership of the bedroom it only changed when the owner wanted it to?" Lily was silent for a minute before what James had said sunk in.  
"You mean the room is mine now?" She shrieked. When James nodded she flung herself at him. "Oh thank you."  
"Don't mention it." He said, returning her hug "You don't have anywhere else to go and mum adores you."

Their moment was ruined however a second later when Sirius ran into the room and flung himself at the bed screaming "Sirius to the rescue!" Lily and James stared at their slightly mental friend for a minute. "Sirius what the hell are you doing, jumping on MY bed?" Lily asked him, feigning annoyance.  
"Sorry Love." He said not the least bit apologetic. Lily rolled her eyes and started talking with James about their final bit of Holiday homework, Transfiguration, which she had always struggled with.

"Wait a minute, YOUR bedroom" Sirius burst out five minutes later, causing Lily and James to start laughing.  
"Very quick, aren't we mate?" James chortled at his best friend's slowness.  
"Yes Sirius it's my room." She told him.  
"But doesn't that mean…" He was cut off by James' frantic interruption.  
"Yes Sirius the room is hers now." Lily stared at the two boys curiously, before brushing off their weird behaviour and standing up off the bed.  
"Come on, I'm hungry let's go down to the kitchen." She said, laughing when Sirius raced out the door almost knocking her over.

James and Lily were just leaving the room when they heard a crash. They ran top the stairs and almost fell down them from laughing so hard. Sirius was lying at the bottom on the staircase; limbs at a funny angle and face squished into the carpet. Resting over the top of him were the curtains from the living room windows. Sirius was screaming and rolling around on the floor trying to throw the drapes off of him.

After laughing at him for well over a minute James and Lily decided to come to his aid. James summoned the curtains off of Sirius and Lily rushed down the stairs to shut-up the hysterical boy.

"What on earth is all this noise?" Asked a voice from their left. In the doorway down to the dining room and then the kitchen stood Elizabeth Potter. She was a mature lady with long rusty brown hair streaked with Grey pulled up in a bun. She stood with her hands on her hips and a disapproving look on her face, but Lily could see the sparkle in her Blue eyes. "Hey Mum." James said over Sirius. "Sirius was just being – oh for goodness sakes Sirius it's gone so shut up!" When Sirius didn't shut up and James looked like he was about to kill him Lily decided to step in and silenced Sirius.

"As James was saying, Sirius was just being Sirius Mrs. Potter." Lily said as James nodded in agreement.  
"Well I wouldn't expect any different." Mrs. Potter said, calm and irritated exterior slipping as she began to laugh along with the two young people at Sirius' expense. A few minutes later after extracting a promise from Sirius' that he would shut up – by threatening she would make him go on a date with Sarah – Lily lifted the curse off of Sirius.  
"It's nice to see you again Mum." He said to Mrs. Potter shooting the other two teenagers a murderous look.  
"I wish I could say the same thing to you Sirius." Mrs. Potter winked, causing Lily and James to laugh even harder, whilst Sirius pouted.

"It is nice to see you Mum." James said when he had calmed down, enveloping his mother in a bear hug. As soon as James had let go Sirius took his place. Lily stood back in the shadow smiling fondly at the scene but also feeling a deep sadness. She no longer had a mother figure in her life.

"Lily Dear." Mrs. Potter said opening her arms out to Lily when Sirius finally let go of her. Lily stepped out of the shadow and gave Mrs. Potter a hesitant hug – she didn't want to over step the boundaries. "Mrs. Potter thanks for letting me stay here." She told to woman.

"It's Elizabeth or Mum Lily." She said as if she had said it before.  
"Sorry Elizabeth I forgot." She said guiltily.  
"No Problems Lily dear, and as for letting you stay here your family now, didn't the room tell you that." Out of the corner of her eye she saw James elbow Sirius in the stomach but she ignored it."Really I am?" Lily asked trying to keep the tears out of her eyes.  
"Of course, you are like family to us and I wouldn't have it any other way."  
"She's right you know Lily." James said, walking up behind her and wrapping his arms around her waist. Lily sighed in content as she leant her head back against James' chest. She finally belonged. Once again Sirius managed to ruin the moment.

"I'm Hungry, weren't we going to eat?" He whined, sticking out his lower lip.  
"Yes Padfoot, we can go eat now." James sighed, rolling his eyes at how dense his best friend was.

__

"So Lilykins, what do you want to do now?" Sirius asked bouncing on the balls of his feet. The three teens were all sitting around in the kitchen. Sirius at the table, Lily on the counter and James was leaning against the counter next to Lily's legs.  
"Hex you, finishing eating, hex you." Lily snapped. Sirius had eaten his food so fast her brain hadn't had time to process the fact that he was eating it and was now bored; so to say he was irritating Lily would be a huge understatement.  
"Well that's not really very nice is it?"  
"Neither is you face." Lily retorted sticking her tongue out at the boy.

"Yea, well your mum's face." Sirius said, equally as childishly before freezing as he realised who he was talking to. As soon as the words were out of his mouth he regretted it. James froze and a look of horror appeared on Lily's face.  
"Lily, I'm so sorry I didn't mean it." Sirius cried horrified rushing towards the teary eyed girl.  
"Don't touch me." She snapped at him as he tried to hug her.  
"Lily… I forgot,"  
"Too bad, you shouldn't have forgotten. Do you ever forget about Remus? Or James? NO so why forget about me." She shrieked before running out of the room and slamming the door.

"Mate, I didn't mean it." Sirius said in despair, begging for James to believe him.  
"I know you didn't" James told him solemnly "But you need to think before you open your mouth."  
"I know." Sirius sighed looking at his feet. "I'm such an idiot."  
"Look mate, I know you didn't mean it and you feel really bad about it at the moment, but she's already feeling guilty about intruding. She doesn't realise that we all want – no need her here."

"But the bedroom next yours accepted her, doesn't that mean..."  
"It doesn't mean anything Padfoot." James cut him off "except what you already know. Now I'm going to go check on her. STAY HERE!" James said before rushing up the stairs leaving Sirius in his wake. "I know one day she really will feel like she belongs," Sirius whispered after him before he collapsed into one of the chairs at the bench, head in his hands in despair.

__

James climbed staircase towards Lily's room slowly, thinking about what approach he should take. Sirius had said something incredibly immature in the first place and when coupled with Lily's current state it was a completely stupid thing to do. He was walking past his bedroom to get to Lily's when he noticed the door was partially open. It had defiantly been closed when they had gone downstairs earlier. He hesitantly pushed the door open hand hovering above his wand when he heard muffled sobbing. Lily. He opened the door completely to reveal Lily curled up in a little ball on his bed, clutching one of the pillows to her chest.

"Lily." He said softly walking over to sit on the bed next to the distraught girl.  
"Sorry James." She mumbled into his pillow.  
"Hey what are you sorry for?" He asked her confused.  
"I didn't mean to come into your room and I don't know why but I just did." She told him sitting up. James was shocked, he looked to see if she was joking but she looked really guilty.  
"Hey, hey that's enough okay." He said grabbing her shoulders "Stop apologising for things you have no control over or things that are silly alright."

"I am being silly aren't I?" Lily sniffed as James wrapped his arm around her shoulder. When he didn't answer she laughed weakly. "I'm right aren't I?"  
"You did overreact." James said carefully "But no one thinks any less of you."  
"When did you get all tactful?" She asked him, waking him playfully on the shoulder.  
"I'm being serious Lily we know you're suffering and we know that you have to be strong for everyone else, that it costs so much energy to do so. Lily you don't have to pretend round us. You can't fool us." He said earnestly  
"I know James, I know." She said sadly "But hiding how I feel has always been a habit and it's hard to break."

"We get that, we really do know how hard it is for you, so let's make a deal."  
"What…"  
"For the rest of the holidays no more hiding how you feel, it will really lift a weight off you shoulders."  
"I dunno…." Lily hesitated  
"Come on it's for you not us, just try it please." James pleaded; he really needed Lily to see how much she needed to do this.  
"Well if you think so…"  
"I really do think it will help."  
"Alright then." She said finally.  
"Thank Lily." James said, causing her to yelp when he suddenly wrapped his arms completely around her.

They stayed wrapped in their tight hug until James remembered about Sirius.  
"Sirius still feels really guilty about what he said." James told her, untangling himself from her.  
"He shouldn't I totally over reacted." Lily said guilt evident in her voice.  
"Well he didn't think before he opened his mouth." James tried to reason with her  
"It's Sirius. Does he ever think before he opens his mouth?" Lily asked jokingly.  
"No I guess not." James said, "But he needs to be careful in the future, what if the next time the person he offends doesn't know him so well."  
"He'll be fine James." Lily soothed, placing her hands over his in a calming gesture "He's learnt his lesson, I can tell he feels really, really bad. I swear nothing could make me hold it against him."  
"I know, I know it's just he's my best mate and has no one looking out for him. I don't want him to end up in Azkaban." He admitted  
"And he's not going to, Sirius may act like an idiot but he isn't one."

"I realise. I'm being stupid and girly – if he found out I was talking about him like this he'd give me so much for so long." James laughed  
"I'm sure he wouldn't. AND there is nothing wrong with being girly."  
"Of course not, if you're a girl."  
"Whatever." Lily said, sticking her tongue out at him  
"I'd better go send Sirius up, he's probably pissing himself with nervousness right now." James laughed.

* * *

"Knock Knock." Sirius said hesitantly as he tapped on the door frame of James' bedroom. When James had told him where Lily was he had smirked mockingly at his friend but inside he had wanted to start doing cartwheels – finally Lily was beginning to really trust James.  
"Hey Sirius." Lily said, patting the bed next to her indicating she wanted him to sit down.  
"Look Lily, I'm really sorry about what I said…" Sirius started as he sat down  
"I know you are Sirius, you just didn't think."  
"Yea, I don't do that very much do I?" he said hanging his head.  
"Sure you do." She smiled at him "You think to plan pranks don't you?"  
"Yea I guess so." He grinned back before wrapping her in a brotherly bear hug.

"You know James was so worried this whole thing would blow up in his face." Lily said when she could finally breath after Sirius released her.  
"I think he really wants his best friend and his…. new friend to get along."  
"I get that, but it can be a bit annoying."  
"Don't worry he just wants to make sure that no one clashes."  
"But he knows that we get along, and he even said that we act like siblings."  
"Don't worry just tell him and he'll back off." Sirius said, an evil glint coming into his eye "But we can have more fun getting the message through."  
"What do you have in mind?" Lily asked mischievously.

__

James was sitting on the couch nervously reading one of his Quidditch books for the hundredth time. Sirius and Lily had been upstairs for a long time and he was starting to get worried when he heard yelling.

"WELL YOU SHOULD THINK BEFORE YOU OPEN YOU BIG FAT MOUTH NEXT TIME _BLACK_."  
"Well I'm sorry Evans, that your just so goddamned sensitive."  
"Oh so it's my fault now that your so insensitive."  
"I'm not insensitive YOU just take everything so seriously."  
"UGH so what was I supposed to think? Your just like the rest of you family."  
"EVANS." Sirius roared, by now the two of them where standing at the bottom of the staircase glaring daggers at each other. "I am nothing like those foul people. I could have taken it further, like snivey did."  
"So you just implied it, said you'd thought about it. I can't believe you went there." Lily shrieked.

"Whoa, you two what's going on?" James asked the arguing pair loudly, finally shaking himself out of his daze.  
"This idiot won't even admit he's said something to offend me." Lily snapped at the same time Sirius yelled "Evans has a stick so far up her arse she thinks I said something  
wrong."  
"Mate, you did say something wrong." James tried to reason with him.  
"Oh so now you're taking her side over mine." Sirius turned his wrath to James  
"I'm not taking anyone's side." James said  
"You have to." Lily snapped at him "It's that Moron or me."

"Lily, I thought you weren't mad at Sirius." James was confused now.  
"Well maybe I was trying to make you feel better, I was going to try forget about it but then that idiot." She threw her hand in Sirius direction "Just had to be a big headed arrogant jerk."

James was about to say something when he suddenly cast his mind back to his conversation with Lily not half an hour ago. What was it she had said? I swear nothing could make me hold it against him. Something was going on here James realised as he looked out of the corner of his eyes to see Lily's eyes sparkling. Well he thought, he could always play them at their own game.  
"Well sorry, miss ever-so-perfect I suppose you've never said or done anything wrong in your life." James snapped, turning angry eyes towards Lily.  
"I...I...I." Lily stuttered, shocked at James sudden anger towards her  
"I guess us mortals aren't up to your perfect standards."

Sirius stared shocked at his best friend; he couldn't believe James had gone off at Lily like that. He was contemplating how to let James know it was a joke when he noticed something. Behind his back James was making their symbol with his hands, a sign he wanted Sirius to play along with him. Sirius grinned to himself; this whole joke had gotten really complicated. But hey as long as it wasn't on him he was up for it.  
"See Lily, Even you little golden boy thinks that you're just a stuck up little know-it-all." He snipped at Lily.  
"You know what let's just leave Sirius." James said, shooting Lily a glare before turning on his heel. Leaving a shocked Lily behind.

Lily stood in the middle of the room completely shocked. What had started as a harmless joke with Sirius had turned into her being walked out on by the two most important people in her life. It served her right – she reflected – for thinking they actually cared about her. She was so absorbed in her self-pitying thoughts that she didn't hear the quiet footsteps behind her or the contained chuckles until she was lifted of her feet and spun around. Caught off guard a half shriek half giggle escaped from her as James pulled them both onto the couch.

"Gotcha." He yelled as Sirius supported himself against the door from laughing so hard.  
"You guys are so mean." She huffed.  
"I just turned your own game back on you."  
"It was Sirius' game to." She pouted  
"Yea, but Sirius knows me so well he can tell when I'm joking."

"I can't complain can I, if we hadn't done it to you then you wouldn't have done it to me."  
"Exactly." James chuckled, tapping her on the nose "I'm glad you caught on. But I won't do it again, you should know we'd never abandon you okay?" He said  
"Yea Lily, you know that we'd rather die then live without you." Sirius said dramatically from his place by the door.  
"Not quite as melodramatically I do agree with Sirius." James began to stroke her hair.  
"I think I see that now. I suppose I needed that as much as I deserved it." Lily sighed as she leant her head against James chest.  
"Hey guys, sorry to interrupt your beautiful moment but I'm hungry."

**A/N: I am so so sorry for the wait, i know everyone always says that but i really mean it. This is the longest chapter i've ever written. Im on holiday at the moment so I'm going to try and get 2-3 chapters ahead. I also was reading back over the first couple of chapters and they are HORRID so as well as writing new chapters and writing more of late at night(my new story that started as a one-shot and was my favorite thing I've ever written) anyway you know the drill review for sneak peak of the next chapter.**


	10. Shopping and Bonding

**Format Updated 13/3, new chapters on the way**

"Wakey Wakey rise and shine sweetheart." Sirius sung as he burst into Lily's room early on Wednesday morning.

"Wha…" Lily mumbled sitting upright

"It's time to get up and greet the day Lilykins." He continued in his singsong voice.

"Sirius Black." Lily growled as she reached towards her wand, she was now awake and angry.

"Relax Lily, mum sent us to get you up." James soothed appearing in the doorway behind his best friend.

"He could have done it nicer." She grumbled crossing her arms

"Hey I was all for dumping water on your head but this thing here insisted I do it more 'civilly'." He grumped before shrinking into the wall at the evil glare Lily sent his way.

"We'll leave you to get dressed, Mum says you have 5 minutes to get downstairs or she'll make you dance with this idiot on Saturday" – James poked Sirius in the gut.

"Oh and she said dress like a muggle." Sirius chimed in.

"Okay, okay tell her I'm on my way. Now get out!" Lily moaned, slamming the door shut with her wand as soon as they had walked out.

* * *

Exactly four and a half minutes later Lily rushed in the Hall of the Manor, trying to brush her hair and put on her shoes at the same time.

"Whoa Lily, Careful." James laughed as she slid across the floor, putting out a hand to catch her.

"Thank you." She said sarcastically

"What, why are you being all sarcastic?" he asked her cluelessly

"It's your fault I'm rushing around like this, your mother told me she gave me 10 minutes not 5."

"Technically she said 10 minutes from now, and Sirius felt the need to detour by the kitchen so by the time we got to you room it was only five minutes." He smirked at her.

"Whatever you know what I mean." She huffed.

"Lily, just calm down a minute." James said gently, as he picked her brush up off the floor where it had fallen when she rushed in and started to brush her hair for her.

Lily closed her eyes and felt her body relax like it always did when people played with or brushed her hair. No one had brushed her hair for her in a long time, not since she told her mother the summer before 6th years that she was to old.

James pulled the brush through her hair one last time before tying it up in a ponytail on the top of her head.

"There you go." He told her, wrapping his arms around her shoulder's and placing the brush back in her hands.

"Thanks James." She smiled shyly at him.

"Lily dear, are you ready?" Mrs. Potter asked suddenly, startling the two teens.

"Yes Mrs… I mean Elizabeth." Lily said, blushing bright red.

"Alright then we'll be leaving then. James behave." Mrs. Potter said, summoning her and Lily's Robes.

"Mother." James said in a mock hurt voice "Your lack of faith cuts me deep."

"Good that was the point." She said, causing Lily to start giggling.

"Now shoo, we don't want to be late to meet the others."

"What others?" Lily asked, sobering up completely "I thought you said it was just going to be the two of us."

"Well it was, but now it's not. Hurry up." Mrs. Potter laughed as she half dragged Lily out of the door.

_

* * *

_

"Good we're right on time." Mrs. Potter said as they stood in front of a huge dress shop.

"Are you sure? This place is huge." Lily said, looking at the shop in awe.

"Positive, now come on we are going to be late." She said walking towards the entrance, Lily following close behind.

"Mrs. P." Lily asked hesitantly as the two women entered the shop "Who exactly are we meeting here?"

"LILYYY." Lily turned around at the screeching of her name to be pounced on by her three best friends, causing them all to fall to the ground.

"Mary, Alice, Izzy what are you doing here?" she screeched back.

"We wanted to help you pick out THE perfect dress." Alice squealed

"And we needed our own." Mary added

"Ohh this is going to be heaps more fun now." Lily said, picking herself up of the ground.

"So tell us the latest news." Izzy said as soon as the girls were browsing through the racks of dresses

"Yea, your letters are all pretty dry." Mary added.

"Really? Well there is no news. What do you want me to say?"

"Who's hot?" Alice suggested

"Who's annoying?" Mary added

"Let's see. There are no boys this year that weren't there last year except first years, so I'm not even going there." Lily said.

"So no one grew hot over the holidays, or caught your attention?" Alice asked knowingly. Of course there was one boy, but Lily would never give them the satisfaction of being right, or even admit it to herself.

"Those boys at Hogwarts? Nope I think I'm going to end up marrying some hot American wizard. Oh and of course he has to be rich." She said mocking Sarah, causing her friends to burst into peals of laughter.

"Well I'm guessing you still hate Rachel and Sarah?" Alice asked

"Well actually No." Lily said, surprising her friends.

"I despise Sarah, and love Rachel." She knew these words would cause shock waves.

"Wait What?" Izzy asked confused at the same time Alice screamed

"WHAT THE HELL LILY."

Lily stood staring quietly at her friends as she waited for them to get their shock and anger out of their system. When they stopped screaming at her about 10 minutes later she decided it was time to explain to her friends.

"Rachel is actually really nice, she's my best girl friend." At the looks her friends gave her she hurriedly added "at school of course."

"What about everything last year, she made your life miserable."

"Look seriously guys I already went over this with the boys, and they accept her now, I really don't need to go over this again, trust OUR judgement."

"Well if James, Remus and God forbid Sirius accepted her I guess we can." Mary said, shooting Alice a silencing glance.

"Thanks Guys." Lily grinned, conveniently leaving out the fact that it took the boys so long to warm up to Rachel.

"Have you seen anything you like girls?" Mrs. Potter asked, quietly approaching from behind the girls.

"No, nothing really here."

"I didn't think so, younger girls rarely ever find dresses here. Come one we'll go somewhere else." The three girls followed Mrs. Potter down the street into another more modern looking shop.

* * *

"So, what's life like with three boys as your best friends? Three trouble making boys." Alice asked Lily as they wandered around in the isles of jewel-encrusted dresses

"Three Boy? What about Peter?" Lily asked feigning shock "We are so close." This caused the other three girls to start laughing again, attracting snobbish looks from some of the other shoppers.

"But seriously Lily we're curious what's it like?" Mary asked

"It's lots of fun." Lily smiled fondly "The boys are all actually very different from how they act around other's and they're really as funny as you'd expect, if not more so."

"Do you help them with pranks?" Alice was curious

"What do you mean really different?" Mary inquired

"One question at a time." Lily laughed.

"Yea I do help them with pranks, in fact I planned one." She answered Alice's question telling them about the robe prank, which caused even more laughter from her friends, as well as a chuckle from Mrs. Potter who had appeared behind them yet again.

"Well I'm glad you're keeping their pranks safe now Lily." She smiled with a twinkle in her eye. "Alice and Mary I think I found a dress for each you, why don't you go and try them on." She said handing the girls a white dress and a red dress respectively.

The four girls walked towards the dressing rooms, still gossiping.

"So how are they different?" Mary asked again as her and Alice entered their change rooms, Lily and Izzy sitting outside.

"Well Remus is actually really cheeky and dirty." She started, sure to get a few gasps out of the girls. She wasn't disappointed.

"No way Lily, seriously." Alice Squealed

"Hell yea, he can be almost as bad as Sirius and worse than James sometimes."  
"No way." Mary echoed Alice's earlier sentiments

"Yes way." Lily smirked "How long are you guys going to be obsessing over this, because if you want I can just leave." She smirked, jerking her thumb towards the door.

"No stay and tell us more." Izzy whined, grabbing her friend's arm.

"Yea, keep going." Alice encouraged from within her cubical.

"Well Sirius, is actually really sweet and sensitive as well as obsessive." She sighed "I happen to know for a matter of fact he's obsessed with Nancy Drew," She whispered the last bit.

"You mean that Muggle teenage detective in those books?" Alice asked

"Yep." Lily confirmed

"Yea, of course he is," Izzy snorted

"I'm serious, if you want to be bored completely out of your mind just ask him about Nancy Drew."

"Are you sure you're not pulling our legs?" Alice called out.

"No guys I think she might be right." Mary giggled, "Remember last year when Sirius was running round the school screaming something about Nancy Drew owning the Harvey Boy's arses?"

"Hardy Boys." Lily corrected "But yea."

"Oh yea I remember, then he got into that one sided argument with a group of first year girls and scared the shite out of them," Alice started giggling to, pretty soon all of the girls where hysterical at the memory.

A few minutes later after they had all calmed down Alice and Mary stepped out of their respective change rooms.

"Wow you guys look gorgeous." Lily breathed as Izzy nodded in agreement.

"Very Nice." Mrs. Potter nodded from where she was standing by the doorway

"You made great choices Mrs. P." Alice smiled as she spun around in her white dress. It had only one shoulder with a long and flowing sleeve, there was diamante's along the neckline and waist and it was fitted, reaching down to the floor. With Alice's dark hair, pale skin and blue eyes in looked amazing.

"I agree," Mary sighed. She was wearing a fitted red halter neck that spilled down to the floor.

"I don't think we need to try anything else on, these are perfect." Alice sighed, as the two girls returned to the change room to take their dresses off.

"Lily dear," Mrs Potter called out "I think I've found a few dresses for you, do you want to try them on?"

"Oh, yes please." Lily grinned, she loved getting glamed up but had never had the opportunity to do it for a real event.

"Okay, try this one first." She said, handing Lily an Emerald green dress, "then I have a couple more for you."

"Alright then." Izzy said Alice and Mary had changed back and Lily had entered her change room "What about James?"

"What about, what about James?" Lily asked innocently.

"Don't play stupid with us, how is James different to how we think he is?" Alice snapped playfully.

"Hmm well," Lily mused, far off look in her eyes "He's really dedicated, smart and sweet. Plus he's thoughtful and a lot more sensitive then I ever could have imagined. He's just so much more mature than I could have thought in a million years" She finished up, returning to earth with a small smile.

"Ohhhh." Alice cooed as Izzy sung

"Lily loves Ja-ames Lily Loves Ja-ames."

"Shut up you guys, I don't" Lily blushed bright red, thankful that they couldn't see her at that moment.

"Sure you don't Lily," Mary giggled.

"Seriously I don't." Lily huffed exasperated.

"Okay, fine you win we'll drop it." Alice said, rolling her eyes at her friend.

"I dunno about this dress." Lily moaned a couple of minutes later

"Come on Lily we want to see it." Alice said,

"Lily dear, I'm sure it looks lovely." Mrs. Potter said

"It's a bit, well over the top." Lily sighed as she left the change room.

"Wow Lily it's gorgeous." The dress Mrs. Potter had picked out for Lily was an emerald green ball gown with a halter neck. It had a fitted bodice with silver flowers embroidered up it. From the waste down the dress spread out into a flowing ball skirt, just above Lily's ankles.

"Wow Lily you look so gorgeous." Alice smiled at her best friend.

"Yea, It's lovely not to much at all." Mary added.

"And you'll make all the boys go gaga." Izzy added grinning infectiously.

"You really think so guys?" Lily asked, blushing slightly at her friend's complements.

"Yes, Lily dear you look lovely, I don't think we need to bother with the other dresses, we can just lengthen it a little." Mrs. Potter nodded her head as if confirming it to herself as she ushered Lily back into the changing room.

"So that's everyone sorted now." Mrs. Potter grinned as Lily handed her back the dress she had just taken off.

"What about you?" Lily asked Izzy.

"Oh I'm already sorted." She waved her hand around nonchalantly.

"Why don't you girls head outside and I'll just buy Lily's dress." Mrs. Potter suggested as they approached the register. Mary and Alice had bought their dresses while Lily had been getting changed.

"Oh that's right how much do I owe you?" She asked Mrs. Potter, subconsciously reaching for her purse even though she had left it at home.

"Don't be silly dear, your part of the family now." Mrs. Potter said in a tone that said she wanted no arguments.

"But that's not fair, I already live with you…"

"Which is why I am buying it for you." Mrs. Potter said ending the conversation by walking towards the till.

Lily was still moaning about the unnecessary gesture from Mrs. Potter when the four girls reached the street.

"For goodness sake Lily, it's a gift accept it." Mary moaned

"Yes, the dress is gorgeous on you." Izzy agreed.

"And anyway you have no problems with us buying you gifts." Alice said rationally.

"Yea but I you never bought me ball gowns AND I buy stuff for you." Lily tried to reason.

"Look Lily, just let Mrs. Potter buy it for you, your like the daughter she never had and it's understandable that she's spoiling you." Mary explained, her parents were old family friends of the Potters and she understood more about the inner working of the family than any of the other girls.

"Well if you put it that way." Lily said, quickly changing the subject as she saw Mrs. Potter exiting the shop.

"Well that was fun, you guys all look gorgeous but I really need to get going." Izzy told her friends giving them all light hugs and disappearing down a side alley with a small wave.

"She's right Lily we need to go as well." Alice sighed sadly.

"Yea." Mary sighed.

"But we'll see you on Saturday." Alice smiled, suddenly bright again.

"Oh yea, we're coming over to get ready with you." Mary smiled as well.

"Cool," Lily grinned back at her two friends as they exchanged hugs and kisses before they parted ways.

* * *

As Lily and Mrs. Potter returned to the Potter Mansion Lily was a little bit apprehensive. Rachel was already coming over on Saturday to help her get ready, and she knew that her old friends didn't really know the real Rachel that well, and couldn't get over old grudge's that quickly, no matter what Lily thought.

Her worries were put out of her mind when the two women walked up the driveway to see Sirius, James and Mr. Potter playing quidditch on the Potter's huge pitch.

"Why don't you go and see what they're up to." Mrs. Potter smiled, reading Lily's thoughts. "I'll take this stuff inside."

"Okay." Lily grinned before racing around to the pitch.

When she got there she saw the three men up on their brooms throwing around a Quaffle and playfully bantering. She smiled to herself as she folded herself onto the floor; content to watch them all de-stress and bond. About fifteen minutes after she had arrived at the pitch Sirius noticed her and sent her an enthusiastic wave, almost falling off his broom in the process, causing James, Lily and Mr. Potter to all roar with laughter. Soon after the boys all returned to the earth. James and Sirius running at Lily as Mr. Potter stood holding their brooms and laughing at his son's antics. Mrs. Potter soon returning from inside and standing next to her Husband smiling fondly at the scene.

Her friends were right. She really did have a family now.

**A/N: Gosh i had no idea it had been a month since i updated, i thought it was only a fortnight. Anyway next chapter or maybe the one after is the Ball and where this story starts to pick up abit. So review and get a sneak peak as always. Once I write another chapter for Late and Night I will get right onto this. Thanks for you patience and i hope people are still enjoying this story. Oh BTW anyone intrested in BETAing for me, my old one is to busy ATM. If you are a thousand thanks.**

**x's and o's**

**Lilybet**


	11. This was never meant to happen

Lily crawled out of bed at 8 o'clock in the morning of the 24th of December. Wrapping her robe around herself, she stumbled down to the kitchen. She wasn't surprised in the slightest to see Sirius shovelling in piles of food while James and Remus – who had arrived yesterday - laughed at him.

Nor was she surprised Mr. and Mrs. Potter quietly chuckling at the three boys. What did surprise her was the fact that Rachel was sitting in the chair she usual sat at, nursing a cup of coffee between her hands.

"RACHEL!!!" Lily screamed, now fully awake as she ran towards her best friend.

"Lily." Rachel screamed back, jumping up to hug her.

"Oww, My ears." Sirius complained as the two girls caught up, talking so quickly it hurt his head to keep up with their words.

"Shut up Sirius." Lily smacked him on the back of his head.

"Yea, you screamed almost as loud when you saw Remus yesterday." James added, smiling fondly at the two girls.

"Yea, he did. It just proved our theory." Lily said to Rachel.

"What theory?" Sirius asked curiously.

"That deep down, all boys are girls." Rachel said, a matter of factly.

"Yea," Lily agreed. "You just have to get them off guard and they're amazing." She added, giggling slightly.

"Hey!" Sirius complained mocked hurt.

"It's true in you more so than anyone else." Remus spoke up for the first time that morning. Lily noticed he looked extremely tired, even though the full moon wasn't for another two and a bit weeks.

Pretty soon, Rachel sat back down in her chair and Lily was left without a seat. Despite having a dining room that was big enough to hold over a hundred people - extended and retracted with a charm - the kitchen only had 6 chairs, there were generally only five people staying in the house anyway. She quickly surveyed the room before she walked over to James and sat down in his lap, picking a piece of bacon off his plate.

"Oi, that was mine." James grumbled as she smirked at him.

"I know, it was so kind of you to offer me some." She continued to smirk before calling the Potter's house elf and asking for some food. She had long since learnt to let them do their job, they enjoyed it.

"Nervous for tonight?" James asked her quietly.

"No, what made you ask that?" Lily asked, lying through her teeth.

"The fact you're lying." James said, stopping when Lulu, the Potter's house-elf appeared with a plate of food for Lily. "And you're really tense." He added once Lulu disappeared and Lily was playing with her breakfast.

"Okay, maybe I'm a little bit nervous." Lily admitted, pushing away her plate after a few bites of food.

"What is there to be nervous about?" He asked her.

"This is my first wizarding event ever." She admitted, playing with her hands. "Besides things at Hogwarts that don't count, I want to make a good impression."

"And you will." James soothed, placing his hands comfortingly on her shoulders.

"I dunno, what if I trip when I walk in, or I look stupid, or I walk in to the wrong place or people laugh, or they don't like me or…or…or…"

"Lily calm down, you're being silly." James whispered as he wrapped his arms all the way around her shoulders.

"Sorry James, I'm just really nervous." she smiled quietly at him.

"It'll be fine." James repeated, "You'll look gorgeous, you always do. You won't trip; you aren't a clumsy girl, why would they laugh at you or not like you? Do think logically." He smiled reassuringly at her.

"And walking in?" she asked him in a small voice.

"That's what you're mostly worrying isn't it?" he asked her quietly. She nodded meekly and he laughed.

"Don't worry about it," he whispered in her ear, "You can enter with me if you really want to."

"I would love to." She sighed, visibly relaxing. "But what about Rachel?"

"Our friend, Sirius asked her to walk in with him." James smiled at the memory.

"They need to get over themselves and get together." Lily sighed, leaning back on James chest.

"You think?" He laughed. "Now eat." He told her sternly. She also laughed before grabbing some more bacon off of his plate, and taking a long gulp of his pumpkin juice.

"I meant your own food, you cheeky monkey." He scolded playfully before he began to tickle her. She began to shriek with laughter as James chuckled along with her.

When James finally relented, Lily looked up to find the other five pairs of eyes in the room on her and James. She blushed bright red and hid her face in James' chest, like a child, causing everyone else in the room – including James – to start laughing. Lily pouted into his chest as it vibrated with a deep and long chuckle.

"Oh be quiet you guys." Lily huffed.

"Leave Lily alone guys." Mr. Potter scolded, James and Rachel started to let silence in their bodies, though Sirius and Remus where still shaking.

"Lily, there's something I want to give you in my study. Would you mind?" Mr. Potter tried to free Lily again.

"Of course Mr. P." she said, getting up off James leg and following him out of the room, glad for the quick and easy exit he offered.

__

"Thanks for the save Mr. P." She grinned at him as she sunk into one of the many armchairs in his Private study.

"It was no trouble Lily." He grinned back. Lily took a good look at him; he had sparkling hazel eyes, the exact same as James' and salt and pepper hair, there were laugh lines around his eyes and wrinkles were starting to form on his forehead, but otherwise you couldn't tell his age.

"I actually just wanted to thank you for all you have done for this family." He told her sincerely, sitting down opposite her.

"All I've done for this family?" Lily asked genuinely shocked. "I should be thanking you guys for what you've done for me, and for putting up with me."

"Nonsense, I'm serious about this Lily. You're good for the boys, you keep them in line and on their toes, and they've got a new found respect for women now." He said, winking at her. It was true that Lily had kept their pranks safer, she grudgingly agreed.

"Okay, so maybe I've done that, but wouldn't you think they resent me for that?" She asked.

"Honestly Lily, do you really think they'd resent you?"

"No." She admitted "But even so, you've still done more for me than I have for you. You've given me a roof over my head; you fed me and bought me clothes."

"And in return you're like the daughter we never had." He sighed. "Elizabeth has always wanted a daughter and she finally got one in you." He said. "The perfect one in you." He corrected himself.

Lily's eyes teared up as she listened to Mr. Potter, "Do you really think so?" She asked him tearfully.

"Of course I do Lily, why would I lie?" He smiled at her "Listening to James and letting you stay here was the best decision me or my wife ever made."

"Thank you." She smiled through her tears at him sincerely.

"Don't even mention it." He grinned back. "I just can not wait till your properly part of this family."

"What do you mean sir?" Lily asked him confused,

"Oh you will know soon enough." He smirked knowingly at her "Now the reason I called you in here was because I have something for you." He walked over to his desk and pulled out a beautifully carved jewellery box. Nestled inside was a sliver and pearl hair comb. He held the box out to her wordlessly and gestured at her to take the comb.

"My mother gave this to me before she died, she said that I was to give it to my daughter. Sadly I have no daughter of my own, but I do have you so it's yours now."

"Are you serious? I can't take this."

"Of course you can dear, I have no use for it do I?" He smiled at her. "Now go and get ready for this ball." He smiled at her yet again as she walked out of the room in search for her friends. She found them all talking and joking in James' bedroom.

"Hey guys." She smiled as she closed the door behind her and walked over to the bed where they were all sitting.

"Lily, what did dad want?" James said, pulling her down onto his lap suddenly causing her to laugh.

"Just to give me something." She shrugged nonchalantly and turned to the others. She grinned to herself when she noticed that Rachel was leaning against Sirius and he had his arm flung over her shoulders. Lily would definitely have to ask her friend what was up later. Too soon, it was time for Lily and Rachel to leave the boys to get ready for the ball.

"Remember, no sneak peaks." Lily winked at the boys as her and Rachel walked out of James' room "You'll get to see 'em tonight."

__

"So what's going on with you and Sirius?" Lily asked Rachel as soon as she had shut her bedroom door.

"Nothing." Rachel sighed.

"Honestly?" Lily asked her, leaning against the wall.

"Honestly." Rachel answered sadly.

"But you wish there was something."

"Well…maybe." Rachel admitted to her friend.

"I knew it." Lily squealed jumping on the bed next to her friend

"Is it really that obvious?" Rachel asked her best friend.

"Yes." Lily replied, before realising what her friend meant, "Well to me, I'm sure no one else can tell."

"So what are you going to do about it?" Lily asked her.

"Nothing." Rachel sighed again. "He obviously doesn't like me so I don't want to make it awkward or anything."

"What makes you think he doesn't like you?" Lily asked, sure that her friend was wrong.

"Because I can tell he doesn't treat me any different from anyone else, because he still flirts with all those girls at school and because Sirius Blake has never actually liked anyone in his entire life."

"Well you could be the first." Lily tried to convince her friend what was obvious to everyone else. It really frustrated her to no end how some people were meant to be together but couldn't see it.

"Not likely, I'll just be his friend. It's better than nothing." Rachel nonchalantly said.

Lily was opening her mouth to respond when the bedroom door slammed open. Lily turned ready to yell at the boys only to find herself facing her three best friends.

"Alice, Izzy, Mary." Lily cried, rushing to hug her friends.

"Hey Lily." Alice smiled at her friend, returning her hug. The two other girls echoed her greeting. Lily glanced to see where Rachel was to find her shrunk into the headboard of the bed. With a jolt Lily remembered she hadn't told Rachel her other friends were coming, and that there last meeting was less that civil. Mary's eyes followed Lily's and she felt a stab of pity for the younger girl.

"Hey Rachel." She smiled "I'm Mary." And with that the ice was broken, and the girls got ready talking as if Rachel had been part of their group for years.

"Lily, you look so gorgeous." Rachel breathed as she placed the silver comb into Lily's hair with deft hands.

"No I don't." said a blushing Lily.

"Of course you do Lily, don't be silly." Mary said, applying her last coat of lipstick in the huge mirror.

"You're going to knock James dead." Alice smirked, causing Lily's receding blush to deepen.

"Come on. Let's just get done there." Izzy said, saving Lily from the other girl's scrutiny.

"Thank Iz," Lily whispered to her friend as they walked towards the staircase where the boys where waiting.

"Don't mention it Lily. That's what friends are for right?"

"Of course." Lily smiled back at her, before waiting behind for Rachel.

"So, I hear Sirius is escorting you tonight." Lily teased her friend; it was now Rachel's turn to blush.

"Yea he asked me at breakfast."

"Well your going to 'knock him dead'" Lily laughed, as she looked at her friend and appreciated the truth in the words. Rachel was wearing a floor length purple chiffon boob tube dress. It had a diamante-encrusted bodice with purple drapes of fabric across it. She had shoes the same colour as the diamantes and her hair was loose and wavy.

"Sure, sure, do you feel gorgeous?" She asked changing the subject.

"A little bit," Lily admitted as she started to descend the stairs. She had dainty silver heels on her feet and her hair was pulled up into a messy bun that was held together with the silver comb. She had no jewellery to wear so her neck and arms were bare, though she didn't care.

When the two girls reached the bottom of the staircase, after the other three they were greeted by Sirius and James. Rachel smiled at Lily once before walking off with Sirius leaving James with Lily.

"You look beautiful." James said to her.

"Thanks, you don't look that shabby yourself."

"Lily dear, here's your mask." Mrs. Potter breezed by, shoving a white mask encrusted with diamonds and emeralds into Lily's hands before disappearing again. Lily looked aghast at the thought of how much it cost.

"Don't worry it's a family heirloom, you can give it back to her at the end of the night." James told her, removing it from her hands to place it gently over her eyes,

"Almost perfect." He told her, staring into her eyes. "Turn around." Lily did as she was bid and James slipped something cool around her neck. She looked down to discover a diamond and emerald necklace, just as he slid a matching bracelet up her arm.

"James I defiantly can't take this." She said, trying to take the necklace off. James warm hands covered hers and prevented her undoing the clasp.

"Of course you can, and you will." On seeing her defiant face he added "Think of it as a early Christmas present, you can't say no then."

"Well I guess not." She relented.

"Excellent." He grinned infectiously at her and she couldn't help but grin back.

"Ready?" He asked her as he pulled his own mask over his face.

"I guess." She said hesitantly

"Then let's go." She grasped onto his arm and the ballroom doors swung open.

__

Lily was having the time of her life. She felt beautiful and it showed. She looked happy and radiant. As she finished her dance with Sirius and moved back towards James, Sirius walked towards Rachel. Lily sent her friend a wink, causing Rachel to giggle and blush furiously and James and Sirius to look at her strangely.

"She likes him doesn't she?" James asked Lily as the music started up again.

"Yea, it's so obvious they're meant to be together." She sighed. "But she thinks Sirius doesn't like her."

"Well Sirius doesn't know that he likes her but he certainly does." James smiled at her.

"Just give him time and he'll figure it out for himself which means NO meddling." James added when Lily looked deep in thought.

"Fine, fine. But they're so frustrating." She sighed again.

"People could say the same thing about you." He smiled at her and tapped her nose.

"Shut up." She mumbled, leaning her head into his chest as the music got slower.

"What is with all the people in the black with matching white masks?" Lily asked James a little while later. She had thought it was odd all night how everyone else had taken their masks off almost as soon as Mr. and Mrs. Potter had entered the ballroom yet these people hadn't.

The fact their clothes where all the same colour and their masks exactly the same had made her wary.

"I don't actually know. They all showed up with invites so we let them in, but the fact they're all dressed the same is a little creepy isn't it." He said, echoing her thoughts from minutes before.

"Yea, just a little." She laughed nervously "but if they had invites it must be alright. Does your mum know who they are?"

"No, but then again she doesn't actually know half the people she invited to these things." James laughed, properly this time.

"James, son care if I steal Lily away for a dance?" Mr. Potter asked, startling the two teens.

"Hmm, well." James pretended to think "Only if you bring her back in the quality I lent her to you in."

"I'm not an object here." Lily grumbled jokingly.

"Alright, it's a deal." Mr. Potter said, shaking his son's hand laughing slightly.

"I wonder if Remus will lend me Izzy for a dance, I haven't caught up with her in ages." James mused as he walked away from Lily and his father.

"So Lily, are you enjoying this ball so far?" He asked her as they began to dance around the ballroom.

"Oh yes, it's so much fun." Lily gushed smiling brightly "It was amazing to dress up and everyone else looks so pretty and the boys are on their best behaviour and there is nothing to worry about except wether I'm going to fall off of these shoes."

"Well, I'm glad you're enjoying it. You're going to get used to these." He told her, smiling fondly at her.

"Really? Why?" She asked him.

"Because James must have told you they are a yearly tradition and of course you'll always be invited."

"Really? Well I'm sure no other one will top this one." She smiled fondly at him.

"You'd be surprised." He told her, far off look in his eyes and she wondered where he had disappeared.

"Well, I sure hope they will all be this much fun."

"They will be, he assured her. In fact I can't wait to see how you grow up over the years. These are the events we can see the biggest change in James. And this year it has been amazing how much he's matured. I think we have you to thank for it."

"You may thank me, but I doubt James does."

"He's thankful for you more than you will ever believe." Mr Potter smiled at her one last time as the music finished and James appeared at her shoulder once again.

"There, you go son." Mr. Potter said to his son, spinning Lily towards him. "Good as before."

"Hmm." James caught Lily and pretended to look her over. "Well I suppose there are no damages here." He finally said.

"Good, I'm off to find your mother." Mr. Potter said as Sirius appeared at his shoulder.

"It's almost Christmas." He said, bouncing on the balls of his feet.

"Yes Sirius, you've been telling us that all day." Lily sighed.

"No Lily, there's two minutes till Christmas." James told her.

"Oh, is it already that late, it hasn't felt that long." She sighed, wanting the night to never

end.

"Well it has been." Mr. Potter smiled at them, as Sirius began to count down.

"60…59...58..."

Remus let Peter dance with Izzy and joins them.

"45…44…43…"

Rachel making her way over to the group is stopped by a handsome masked stranger.

"32…31…30…"

Alice and Frank are dancing in there own little world.

"21…19…18…"

Mary walked over to Rachel and the stranger.

"17…16…15…"

Mr. Potter smiles at the teens and spotted his wife who started to move towards him.

"8…7…6…5…"

Rachel and Mary free themselves from the handsome stranger and continue towards the group.

"3…2…1…"

The people in the masks all take out there wands and start to hex the crowd.

Sirius, James and Remus pulled out their wands as a group of the masked people surrounded them.

"James." Mr. Potter called demandingly from somewhere to their left. "Get to the safe room."

Sirius and Remus began to stun the death eaters and James held a trembling Lily to him.

Lily was shocked, she hadn't thought she'd need her wand and had left it upstairs, but she felt helpless now. She felts James' arms wrap around her and she felt better, she wished she wasn't so weak and helpless.

"That's the last of them, let's go." Sirius called as he and Remus ran towards the study.

"Come on Lily, let's go." James yelled, dragging her along with him, before suddenly picking her up and running with her in his arms.

They reached the study doors and Remus burst in, closely followed by James with Lily still trembling in his arms. Sirius stood hesitantly by the door.

"Sirius, hurry the freak up before we give away our spot." James yelled at his friend.

"What about Rachel?" he asked softly "and Peter and Mary and Izzy." He added quickly.

"Mate, we're all worried about them but they'll learn to…" James was cut off by Sirius' heart broken cry. "Rachel."

Lily jumped out of James arms and ran to the door next to Sirius to see Rachel lying on the floor, surrounded by fire. Lily screamed.

"Shh, Lily." James covered her mouth with his hand gently. "Look Mary's got it, let's go."

He led a numb Lily towards the desk and muttered a spell under his breath. The bookshelves in the small cove that was hidden from the door began to move and rearrange themselves until there was a small opening just big enough for Lily to walk through upright.

"Come on." James urged pushing her through the opening before stooping low to follow her.

"No, I won't leave her." Sirius cried, as Remus tried to force him towards the safe room.

"Sirius, you'd put all our lives at risk, she'll be fine she's got Mary."

"No, She's not fine, she was on fire."

"Sirius, Mr. Potter is there now, she'll be fine."

"Come on Sirius, Rachel wouldn't want you to get us all killed for her." Lily called out from inside the room.

"Okay fine." Sirius' shoulders shrunk and he walked towards the opening. Remus turned around to shut the study doors and stifled a gasp. He shook his head, he must've been wrong, there was no way that had happened, and he didn't want to worry the others even more. They would find out soon enough if it was true.

"Sirius." Lily sighed, from where she sat; leaning against James' shoulders "Everything will be fine, Rachel will be fine."

"How can you be sure?" he asked her, looking up. She was shocked to see he had been crying.

"Because Rachel's a fighter, and Mary and Mr. Potter were dealing with it. She couldn't be in better hands." Lily noticed Remus' face darken; she decided to ask him about it later.

"Well, I guess so."

"No you need to know so." Lily told him sternly, crawling over to him.

"I can't do that," He told her softly. "Especially if something happened to her."

"Nothing is going to happen." Lily told him, climbing into his lap and wrapping her arms around his neck in a sisterly embrace. "I promise."

**A/N: So not quite a big gap as last time. Links to Rachel and Lily's dresses are on my profile, If you want Alice and Mary's then i can put them up format do you like better, like this or in the block's. So is anyone still reading this story because there were only 4 reviews and 150 hits for last chapter, whats the point in writing this story if no one is reading? I don't mean to sound demanding or anything it would just be nice to know that the hard work i put into this story is appreciated.**

**x's and o's**

**-Lilybet-  
**


	12. Repercussions

**A/N: It's here now. Sorry it was typed a week ago but my beta never got back to me so I got impatient [and nice reviews] SO i'm posting it now, unbeta'd.  
**

"James, seriously what's going on?" Lily asked him in a small voice as she lay curled up in his lap.  
"I don't know Lily." He sighed tightening his arms around her, "I honestly don't know,"  
"Well at least they masked people haven't won because this room is still hidden." Remus pipped up from where he lay against the opposite wall.  
"I thought it stayed hidden even if the Manor was taken over." Lily said, tensing in James' lap.  
"Oh it's meant to, but if these people had the power to infiltrate the manor they'll have no trouble finding this room."  
"Thanks for the reassurance Moony, it's really helpful." James quipped dryly, shutting Remus up.

"Do you think everyone's alright?" Sirius asked, his voice slightly muffled as his face was pressed into the carpet.  
"I hope so." James whispered.  
"Me too," Lily agreed "but I can't help feeling like something went wrong. That something happened to someone."  
"I know what you mean." James agreed as he buried his head in her hair. The group falling into a tentative silence.

What felt like hours later Mrs. Potters voice suddenly filled the huge room.  
"James, it's safe to come out now." She sounded tired and heartbroken.  
"Are you sure?" James asked cautiously, for his safety and his friend's safety he needed to be sure it was actually his mother.  
"Yes it's me, the codeword is LP." She sighed.  
"Alright then, we'll be out in a minute." James said, signalling to his friends to head for the exit that was beginning to form.  
"Are you sure you okay Lily?" He asked her.  
"No." She answered him honestly "but I'm going to have to be aren't I."  
"Not if you aren't, remember the deal. No pretending."  
"Okay." She sighed as she went to follow Sirius' retreating form out the opening.  
"Oh and Lily." James caught her wrist and pulled her back towards him. "I know you've experienced death in your life, but never to the scale it will be out there."  
"Alright." Lily said, taking a deep breath of air to prepare herself for what James had just warned her about.  
"Hey, it'll be fine. You've got us." James told her as he grabbed her hand before leading her out of the safe room.

They where greeted in the Study by a frail looking Mrs. Potter and a shaken Frank and Alice clutching onto each other's hands. Alice's dress was ripped and torn like Lily's and Frank's suit jacket and tie were completely gone. Sirius and Remus were standing to either side of them, looking worried and relieved at the same time.  
"Mum." James cried, rushing over to lock his mother in a tight embrace. He slowly drew away and looked into her eyes.  
"What's going on?" He asked her frantically, worried at the visible despair in her eyes.  
"Maybe you should sit down so we can explain." Frank sighed, and once they had done as instructed he took a deep breath, unsure how to break the heart shattering news to them.

"First things first." Alice said, patting her boyfriend on the shoulder. "Rachel is alive." She directed this news at Sirius. "She has really bad burning and is unconscious at the moment but the mediwitches are tending to her so she should be fine."  
Lily reached over and placed her hand over Sirius' as he sighed in relief. "I told you she would be fine." She told him, her own relief evident in her voice.

"And Mary is fine." Frank added, taking over from his girlfriend. "She had a broken wrist but we fixed that in a second. At the moment she is bothering the mediwitch in charge of tending to Rachel by insisting to help." He forced a laugh, which didn't go unnoticed.

"Peter is also fine." He added quickly. "We saw him straight after the attack but he rushed off, probably to scared to stay." Frank sighed, disdain at the boys lack of courage obvious to all in the room.

The four from the safe room sat in silence for a minute, relived at the fate of their three friends, but painfully aware that there was someone who hadn't been mentioned.  
"She's dead isn't she?" Lily looked up to meet Alice's eyes, tears already brimming in her own. Alice only nodded once before both girls broke down into heaving sobs as Lily rushed over to Alice and they clutched onto each other, falling to the ground.  
It hurt James to know that Izzy had been yet another one of his childhood who he would never see fully grow up and it broke his heart to see Lily so distressed yet again.

James felt someone's eyes on him and looked up to see Frank staring at him, despair visible in his eyes as well. They seemed to be asking James what to do, for some guidance. James had no more clue than Frank as to how to comfort the distraught girls, so he just shrugged and sighed. What should he do? Leave Lily to release her misery with Alice or try and comfort the heartbroken girl. His decision was made for him when Frank ran in and scooped Alice up into his arms, leaving Lily lying on the floor by herself.

James quickly strode over to Lily and crouched down beside her.  
"Sweetheart?" He asked her hesitantly, before she flung herself at him, throwing him slightly off balance.  
"Hey, hey. I'm sorry." He whispered rubbing circles on her back as she wailed into his neck.  
Remus and Sirius still seated in their chairs quickly looked away from the two, feeling as if they were intruding on a secret moment.

Over an hour later the group from the library had all quietly moved into the small sitting room upstairs. Lily was still lying defeated wrapped in a blanket in James' arms on the loveseat. Sirius and Remus sat on the floor as Mrs. Potter perched on the armchair.

"We have Izzy's mask." She told them, sounding tired and defeated. "Do you want it Lily?" She asked the shaking girl gently.  
"N..n..no send it to her parents." Lily said, reaching out for the mask anyway.  
Mrs. Potter gently placed it into the girl's outstretched hands. Lily wrapped her hands around the mask and stared at it in wonder and repulsion. The white mask had tiny diamonds around the eyes and edges and at the side of each eye a small snake coiled around its self.  
"What's with the snake?" James asked Lily, grabbing her hands as she traced it for the 5th time.  
"I don't know. Izzy said that Peter gave it to her when she was complaining about having no mask." Lily sighed, "He said it had belonged to his father."  
"Peter doesn't know his father." James said, trying to keep the curiosity out of his voice.  
"Yea, apparently his mother kept it, I have no clue why though." Lily sighed, hiding her face into his chest once again.

"Mrs. Potter." A gruff voice called out from the doorway. All the inhabitants of the room spun around to see a man standing in the now open doorway. He walked further into the room and everyone breathed a sigh of relief to see the brown eyes assessing them all. It was just Moody, one of Mr. Potter's favourite Aurors.  
"Alistair." Mrs. Potter nodded towards him.  
"We managed to salvage one of the death eater's masks." He told her grimly.  
"Well let's see it." He wordlessly walked forward and handed her a familiar looking white mask. It had diamonds around all the edges, and a familiar snake coiled on the right hand side of the mask.

"What." James gasped in shock.  
"James, what is it?" His mother asked him worriedly.  
James glanced at Lily before cautiously continuing. "Look at this mask," He said, gesturing to the mask his mother was holding, "and compare it to this one." He gently pried Izzy's mask out of Lily's hands and gave it to his mother.  
"Oh My." Mrs. Potter said, "This is quite alarming indeed."  
"What?" Lily asked, sitting up to get a better look at whatever they were talking about. Mrs. Potter tried to pull the mask away, but Lily caught a glimpse before it disappeared from her view.  
"No." She almost yelled when she realised what they are talking about. "It's just a coincidence."  
"Lily, what is the likelihood it was a coincidence?" James asked her quietly.  
"NO I won't believe it."  
"Lily, I don't want to believe it either, but what else are we supposed to believe?" Remus asked her.  
"It's a coincidence." Lily repeated "You've known Izzy longer than me, she wouldn't do it, would she?" she turned to Sirius this time, desperation to believe in the goodness of her friend to her dying breath.  
"She doesn't seem the type, but that doesn't mean she wasn't." Sirius said hesitantly.  
"Come on guys, Peter gave her the mask, doesn't that make it more likely that Peter is a death eater."  
"Peter?" Sirius laughed, "Yea right."

"Oh so Izzy could be but Peter couldn't?" Lily barked, tears threatening to reappear.  
"Lily has a point guys." James sighed, tightening his arms around the hysterical girl. If Lily needed to believe that her friend was innocent it would do no harm, she was dead now. "It could have been a coincidence, for all we know Peter's dad was a death eater, but we have more important things to worry about then a _dead _friend's loyalty, lets keep our final memories of her as a good friend." James sighed.  
"Honestly?" Lily asked hopefully.  
"Honestly." James agreed. "And while we're talking about honestly, Mother." James said, looking at his mother straight in the eyes "What has honestly happened to dad."  
"W..w..what makes you think anything has happened to your father."  
"I can see it in your eyes." James sighed, wiping his hand over his face, wishing this nightmarish day would finish.  
"He..he was hit with a dark curse." She finally sighed, looking away from her son's suddenly old looking eyes. "He's alive and improving at a certain rate." She told him earnestly.  
"Where are the sick and injured being kept?" James asked.  
When Mrs. Potter seemed hesitant to answer Frank spoke up. "In the spare tower."  
"Right." James said, lifting Lily gently off his lap before he stood up and strode out of the room.  
"We're going to have to follow him aren't we?" Remus asked Sirius, who nodded  
"Yep."

__

When Lily, Remus and Sirius arrived in the makeshift hospital they found James sitting with his back to them on a vacant bed talking to someone he was blocking from their view. When the three approached them they saw it was Rachel who was sitting propped up on a pile of cushions, looking tired, haggard and still a little burnt but otherwise well.  
"Rachel." Lily cried, rushing over to her broken friend, pesky tears threatening to spill over yet again.  
"Hey Lily." Rachel smiled at her, voice sounding surprisingly chirpy for her situation.  
"Oh, your alright." Lily gasped, flinging her arms around her friend.  
"Yep." Rachel smiled at her, "Thanks to Mary." She gestured to Mary, who Lily had just noticed sitting on the end of the bed.  
"I'm so sorry we abandoned you." Lily sobbed.  
"Hey, hey it's not your fault. You did the right thing." Rachel told her friend earnestly. "And we're both safe now, so it'll be okay."  
Lily nodded, and turned around to step back from the bed so the boys could make sure Rachel was okay - they had become almost as protective of her as Lily – when she saw an odd look in Sirius' eyes. She thought back to the conversation she had with Rachel only that afternoon. Maybe one good thing would come out of this attack, she though as she stepped towards James and let Remus check on Rachel.

"Notice Sirius?" James leant forward to whisper in Lily's ear, startling her.  
"What about him?" She asked, although she thought she knew the answer.  
"Look at the way he's looking at her." James said, confirming her suspicion.  
"It's really cute." Lily smiled, leaning her head into James' neck. "Do you think we might need to give them a moment?"  
"Probably." James sighed, "and we should probably go and help mum clean up or something." He reluctantly unwrapped his arms from around Lily.  
"Come on Remus, let's go try and make ourselves useful." He said to his friend.  
"Yea," Lily added, "We can go see if poor Mrs. Potter needs anything. You can come to Mary."  
Remus opened his mouth to question them but Mary, who was the only one with her back to Rachel, moved her eyes behind her and Remus understood.  
"Okay," He agreed "I think I saw her up that way." He pointed in the opposite direction, and the four teenagers left the two almost lovebirds to sort themselves out.

__

The group of four found Mrs. Potter sitting in a chair next to her husband's bed.  
"Mum." James whispered softly as Lily let out a chocked sob. Mr Potter was lying unconscious on the bed, his body badly burnt and scared. There was a mediwitch standing by the head of the bed, muttering spells to herself and waving her wand  
"Oh my god." She choked, before she realised that she wasn't helping. She felt Remus place a comforting hand on her arm and tried hard not to cry again.

At that moment Mrs. Potter stood up from her chair and let James lead her a short way away from the bed. Lily, Remus and Mary quickly followed them when James signalled for them to come over.

"I've never seen a curse like it." Mrs. Potter was telling James, "But then again curses are generally your father's specialty."

"Hey, he'll be fine Mum, Ms. Rawlins is looking after,"  
"I suppose your right." Mrs. Potter sighed. "Now what was it you wanted dear?"  
"We actually just wanted to give Sirius and Rachel some time to themselves." James laughed as his hand found Lily's. "But if there's anything that we can help you with…"

He was cut of by a loud bang over by Mr. Potter's bed. They all raced over to see Mr. Potter's hand lying limply over the edge, chest not moving. Ms. Rawlins was running in the opposite direction  
"BITCH." James roared and ran after her, wand in his hand.

"Oh My God." Mrs. Potter began to sob before collapsing to the ground. Remus who was the closest to her caught her and lowered her softly to the ground. Mary rushed to his side and after a whispered conversation ran off. Lily hesitated, looking between Remus and where James had run off. Remus saw her hesitation.  
"Go after James." He told her  
"You sure."  
"Yes, otherwise he'll do something stupid." When he saw she was still hesitant he yelled, "Go hurry."  
Lily quickly ran off in the direction she had last seem James, and hoped that he was safe and hadn't done anything stupid.

__

"You killed my father." When Lily finally caught up to James he was standing over Ms. Rawlins who was backed into a corner sobbing quietly. He had his wand pointed between her eyes.  
"James, what are you doing?" Lily called out, horrified.  
"Just what needs to be done." He said. Lily was shocked by the anger and hate in his voice.  
"No one needs to be murdered James."  
"Its just Karma." He sobbed.  
"No James, turning into a murderer is not Karama, It's something you'll regret."  
"No I won't, she killed my dad."  
"James, don't be silly." She sighed, stepping tentatively towards him. The only sounds she could hear where Ms. Rawlins noisy sobs and James' heavy breathing.  
"It's not silly." He finally growled "its Justice." He lifted his wand once again.  
"No James don't." Lily cried, throwing herself at him.  
"Don't try and stop me Lily," He growled again  
"No James, I will stop you." She snapped, "Because your being irrational and you WILL regret taking another humans life." She stood in front of him, and placed her hands on his arms.  
"She's not human." He whispered, "She's a murderer."  
"And if you kill her you'll be a murderer as well." She pleaded with him, begging him to lower his wand.

"Lily." Remus and Sirius raced towards her from down the hallway, looking frantic.  
"I won't regret justice." James repeated, shrugging of her hands.  
"James NO." Sirius yelled, tackling his friend to the ground. Remus quickly pulled Lily back from the wrestling boys and bound Ms. Rawlins hands and feet together so she couldn't escape. James and Sirius were rolling around on the floor, Sirius was trying to get James' wand off of him and James wanted to get to Ms. Rawlins no matter what the cost.  
"Stop it." Lily shrieked, struggling to get to them but Remus' hands held her back. "Stop it."  
Suddenly Sirius let out a victorious cry and jumped away from James, with two wands in his hands. James lay on the floor, breathing heavily and looking defeated. Lily let out a strangled sob and ran towards him, this time Remus made no move to stop her.

"James," She cried when she reached him. He was sitting up by now, heartbroken sobs wracking his body. Lily was at a loss what to do. He was always, always the strong one. She had never seen him cry and had only ever seen him very upset - or at least showing he was upset - once.  
"James." She said gently, reaching out towards him.  
"It's not fair." He continued to sob.  
"Aww James, things like that never are." She sighed wrapping her arms around his neck and trying not to cry herself.  
"It's just not fair, He was going to live, and then she had to kill him."  
"James." She breathed, her heart breaking for him. "I know it's going to hurt for a while, and it'll never go away but he'll want you to move on, remember him but move on." She gently climbed into his lap and he clutched her to him.  
"Didn't I tell you that?" He asked her when his sobs started to subside.  
"Yes, and now it's my turn to pass it on to you." She smiled into his neck weakly. She just hoped he would get through it and not try to bury it like he did everything else.

__

It was after five o'clock when Mrs. Potter sent the teenagers to bed despite their protests.  
"There's nothing you can do now James, nothing you can't do after you've slept." She told him sternly. James was going to argue but after looking into his mother's eyes he realised that she had more than enough on her plate, and went upstairs with a little huff.  
Half an hour later Lily still couldn't sleep. Whenever she closed her eyes her mother's or Mr. Potter's dead body appeared in her head, staring up at her with blaming eyes.  
"Come on," Lily whispered to herself "Your exhausted, you should be sleeping. You need to sleep." Still sleep wouldn't come to her, and when the sun started to peak through her windows she sighed and after wrapping her blankets around herself tiptoed out of her room and knocked on James' door.  
"Come in." His voice sounded tired and old beyond his years.  
When he saw it was Lily at the door he gave her an exhausted yet sincere smile.

"Can't sleep?" He asked her knowingly. She shook her head slightly and he patted the bed next to him. She had clambered up next to him when she heard gently snoring from the corner.  
"What?" She asked James, who laughed slightly.  
"Sirius." He said, motioning to the giant couch, which she could now make out a human form lying on.  
"Oh, why is he in here."  
"To make sure I don't do anything stupid." James said matter of factly a hint of anger in his voice.  
"Oh, James," Lily sighed.  
"You've said that a lot today." James laughed slightly, poking her in the stomach.  
"Just coz I care." She huffed.  
"You know I don't mean it like that." He said, as he wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Whatever." she sighed "I'm so tired but I can't sleep."  
"Are you seeing faces when you shut your eyes?" He asked her.  
"How did you know?"  
"We all are." Spoke up Mary from where her and Rachel stood next to the door Lily had forgotten to shut.  
"What are you guys doing here?" she asked, leaning her head into James' chest. Mary gaped at them slightly while Rachel didn't bat an eyelash and answered the question.  
"We couldn't sleep and were coming to you room, we passed this room saw the door was open and you were in here."  
"So basically no one in this house can sleep." Lily summed up.  
"Yea, pretty much."

"Well, there is him." Mary gestured towards Sirius' still sleeping form.  
"Oh right, come in girls." James yawned as Rachel and Mary walked in. Rachel headed for the couch where Sirius lay and Mary walked up to the foot of the bed.  
"Mary needs a bed." James sighed, and reached over towards his wand.  
"I can do it." Mary said, her wand already in her hand.  
"Actually you can't." James yawned again as he waved his wand and two single beds appeared at the foot of his own.  
"Why not?" Mary asked, climbing into one at the same time Lily questioned.  
"Why are there two beds?"

"You can't." James answered Mary's question first, "Because only the owner of the room can change the design of it."  
"Oh." Mary nodded as she pulled the quilt up to her chin.  
"And Lily, the second bed is for him." James laughed; pointing towards the door which Remus had just clicked shut.  
"How did you know?" Mary asked.  
"Because it makes sense." He said matter of factly.  
James quickly surveyed the room. In the corner Rachel and Sirius were now curled up together on the couch. Mary and Remus were both in their respective beds, and Lily was  
leaning against his chest still.  
"Lily?" He questioned when he received no answer he realised she had fallen asleep. He sighed as he turned the lights out with his wand. The next few weeks were going to be painful so he might as well enjoy the last moments of sleep and peace he was going to get.

**A/N: Okay chapter 13. Hope you liked this one as much as the last one, i got heaps of reviews for that one so thanks for the feedback. Chapter 14 is finished so review for a preview and I'll try get it up in less than a week.**

**x's and o's  
-Lilybet-**


	13. Cracks are appearing, masks are slipping

**A/N: Merry Christmas All dedicated to everyone who reads and reviews my stories. (It's unbeta'd but i wanted you to all have a Christmas present so this is it. If anyone is willing to be my beta I would love you forever,)  
**

"Come on Prongs, let me wake her up. I want presents." Lily woke to Sirius' familiar whining.

"No Sirius, she hasn't been sleeping well recently." She heard James whisper back angrily

"She has been asleep for twelve hours, if she doesn't wake up soon she'll have missed the whole of Christmas."

"The presents will still be there tomorrow." Remus cut in, "But there's no reason to argue anymore as the two of you seem to have woken Lily up with your quarrel." Sirius and James turned around to see Lily staring at them with bleary eyes. Rachel and Mary were sitting in the corner, quietly laughing into their hands at the boy's antics.

"Sorry for waking you Lily." James said, elbowing Sirius in the gut. Lily smiled to herself, everything seemed perfect, until the events of last night returned to her, leaving her gaping like a fish.

"Lily?" James asked hesitantly.

"Your not _that _mad at being woken up are you?" Sirius asked

"No of course not," Lily laughed, fooling everyone for the time being. "So why were you trying to wake me?"

"It's Christmas." Sirius cried, huge smile across his face.

"Yea," Lily drawled "It's been Christmas for the last… 18 hours."

"But it's time for presents." Sirius' grin didn't falter.

"You mean I was meant to get you a present?" Lily asked, feigning shock.

"Yes." Sirius pouted.

"Good thing I did then." Lily smiled as she sat up, pulling James' covers up to her chin.

"Yipped, time to exchange presents." Sirius squealed, "I'll go and get them." He said before rushing out of the room.

"Do you think he realises he could just summon them?" Lily asked as she climbed onto the covers of the bed and crawled up to where James was sitting.

"Probably not." He sighed.

"Want to have some fun?" Lily asked laughing.

"Don't I always." James winked back.

"Accio Christmas Presents." They cried together, a minute later a huge stack of Christmas presents came flying into the room and fell in a pile at the foot of the bed.

"Accio James' jumper." Lily muttered under her breath, a moment later James' cupboard flew open and one of his woolly jumpers landed in her lap. She smiled as she pulled it over her head. All of her jumpers were to thin or pretty, and James' were always especially warm and comfy.

"Oi you, that's mine." James teased her, throwing an arm over her shoulder.

"Well you're not wearing it, and I was so dreadfully cold, so I think you can spare it."

"Well I guess I can." He said, as if it were a great hardship. "Only for you." Sirius running into the room interrupted the rest of their conversation.

"Guys, the presents have gone mis…" He stopped mid sentence when he saw the Pile of presents in the middle of the room and his friends all trying to hold in their laughter, with varying degrees of success.

"That wasn't fair." He pouted, plopping down onto the couch next to Rachel.

"Sweetie, life isn't fair." She told him, leaning her head on his shoulder.

"Whatever."

The room was silent for the next few minutes until Sirius seemed to remember his purpose.

"Christmas." He cried.

"Wow sweetie your starting to sound like a broken record." Rachel laughed, planting a kiss on his cheek.

"What, is that all I get for Christmas." He winked at her causing her to laugh harder. Mary and Lily shared a knowing look before returning their attention to their friends.

"Hmm, let me think about that." She said, pretending to be deep in thought. Sirius however was having none of that, he swooped down and captured her lips in a sweet kiss. When he broke away he grinned and Rachel blushed at the stares from their friends.

Lily finally broke the awkward silence by letting out a loud whoop. "Told you so, told you so." She cried, shrugging James' arm off and running round the room doing some sort of crazy war dance. When she finally stopped she noticed all the eyes in the room were now on her and she raced back towards where she had been sitting before, barrelling into James and knocking them both backwards onto the bed.

"Whoa there Lily, what you so eager about?" Sirius chuckled from across the room, causing her to blush even redder than she already was.

"Okay, so are we going to open these presents now or not?" Remus asked, saving Lily from further embarrassment.

"Yea." Sirius yelled, He really needs a volume switch, Lily thought to herself.

"I'm stuck sorting again, aren't I?" Remus sighed, looking at his friends. Sirius just nodded.

"Fine, the things I do for you guys." He tried to hide his smirk as he began to sort the packages by name.

"Why not use Magic?" Mary asked as she sat down beside him and started to help.

"Because then it's less fun," Sirius Laughed "And it means more work for Moony."

"I knew it." Remus cried, chucking one of Sirius' presents at his friend's head.

While this exchange was taking place Lily noticed James had been quiet, quieter than a Marauder should ever be.

"Hey, are you okay?" She asked him gently, rubbing her hand along his arm.

"What?" He asked, looking at her as if just seeing her. "Oh yea, I'm fine just tired."

"Sure?"

"Positive." He said, giving her a huge grin. Satisfied she went to sit with their friend on the floor, not noticing the way his grin of his face as soon as she turned around, or the fact he sighed and rubbed his hand over his face before taking his place next to her.

* * *

The day of Izzy's funeral rolled around faster than any of them would have liked, it served as a reminder to them that everything that had been happening recently was real, it wasn't some horrible dream. It was a dark reality.

The funeral was well attended, some 100 plus relatives and school friend's of Izzy's showed up but to the little group of 7 they were the only ones there. By the end of the touching ceremony Lily was clutching onto James' stiff arm bawling her eyes out.

After the funeral Peter departed from the group to his house and the other six teens all returned to the manor. As the six of them sat in James' room –which had become there unofficial place – Lily surveyed each of her friends. Sirius was as Sirius always is, joking happy and smiling to keep back his darker emotions of hate and anger. He was so adept at it now that Lily felt sorry for the boy who had become so accustom to sorrow. She knew he would hold it in and what he was feeling would join the rest of his deep rooted emotion, she also knew it would never see the light of day and Sirius would return to how he always was. That she was thankful for.

Next her eyes fell on Rachel, who was sitting next to Sirius. She was probably the least affected out of all of them. Sure she was sad for her friend's loss and she had liked Izzy but she didn't really know anyone who had died. She tried as hard as she could to be sympathetic without seeming fake and Lily was grateful for that.

Remus and Mary were sitting together in a quiet corner chatting. Remus as always had a calm disposition and was the peacemaker. Sure he was hurting about his friend and friend's dad but he figured to be grateful he was still alive. Mary was struggling with Izzy's loss as much as Lily herself, but Remus seemed to be doing a good job of distracting her.

The group hadn't seen much of Alice or Frank recently, they'd only glimpsed them at the funeral and it was worrying Lily. What was wrong with the oldest friend? What had she done to upset her?

But what really had Lily worried was the way James was acting, or wasn't acting. He just appeared to be numb. Speaking when spoken to, laughing when required and putting in the odd comment here and there. Trying his hardest to appear normal. But he wasn't really there with them. She wished he would scream, yell, cry or actually laugh. Anything that would show them that he was really there, that he was grieving and living. Lily couldn't help herself, even thought she was in a conversation with Sirius and Rachel, she just kept looking at James out of the corner of her eyes, waiting for something to happen.

Apparently everyone else was watching him as well because out of the blue he was standing up and screaming at them.  
"What the hell are you staring at?" He was yelling at them "Do you expect me to run away from you, to jump down your throats?"

"James, Mate we're just worried." Sirius said, standing up.

"I AM FINE." He roared "I don't need to be watched constantly."

"James, we're not watching you." Lily whispered.

"Oh really, so you're just staring at me for no reason? Do you like staring at me Lily? DO YOU WANT ME TO STARE AT YOU?" He was still yelling at them. Remus and Mary stared at him is disbelief, Sirius looked sad and Rachel was scared, clutching onto Sirius. He wouldn't hurt her but she didn't know him that well.

"James." Rachel whimpered, "You're scaring me."

"GOOD MAYBE IT'LL TEACH YOU TO LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE." He roared the lights started flickering and the cupboard doors banging.

"I've had enough." He suddenly whispered, the room returned to perfect condition as James walked out of the door.

"Where are you going?" Lily asked him from were she lay on his bed, still shaken.

"Away from here." He told her sadly, looking into her eyes before he turned on his heel and left.

The room was left in a shocked silence until Rachel finally spoke up.

"What was that all about?" She asked.

"That was James not dealing very well." Remus sighed rubbing his eyes with his hand.

"Should someone go after him?" Lily asked hesitantly.

"No, we don't know where he's gone." Remus told her matter of factly.

"Yea, and your just more likely to make him angry by following him at the moment," Sirius told her, gently wrapping his arms around her in a comforting hug. When she felt his arms Lily began to cry, to her horror.

"Hey, hey it'll be okay." Sirius told her gently, used to her by now. He knew she wouldn't stop until she was comforted no matter how embarrassed she was or how much she wanted to stop. "He didn't mean it, he's just angry."

"I know, but it's not fair. It's not fair on James, or Mrs. P or Izzy's family or on you or anyone else."

"Lily sweetie, you've been telling us all week life's not fair. Do yourself a favour and listen to yourself." Rachel told her gently.

"Just because I said it doesn't mean it makes me feel any better."

"Well try it please, for us?"

"I suppose so." Lily sniffled. Sirius kept his arms wrapped around her until her sobs fully subsided and even then left his arm draped over her shoulder casually. Mary hoped up beside her friend and started braiding her hair while Remus, Sirius and Rachel tried to make her laugh. She had been there rock all week, now it was time for them to help her.

* * *

Later that night Lily lay awake in her bed, the first time she hadn't stayed in James' room since that night. She sighed, rolling onto her side again. She hadn't heard James enter his room and was beginning to get worried about him. Sure James could handle himself but when he got angry he didn't use his head.

Half an hour of tossing and turning later Lily heard a creek on the staircase and heavy footsteps she instantly recognised as James'. Breathing a sigh of relief she turned onto her right side, back facing the door. Not a minute later she heard the door creek open and a shadow fell over her bed. Lily sat up and turned towards where James was standing by the door.

"Lily." He breathed softly, walking further into the room. Lily grabbed her wand from her bedside table and muttered the spell to turn the lights on. James looked tired and confused but unharmed.

"Hey, where did you get off to?" She asked him gently as he stood at the foot of her bed.  
"Around." He said, waving his hand in a non-committal gesture.

"Alright then." Lily said

"I'm sorry to wake you, I just wanted to apologise for yelling at you before." He smiled at her.

"Don't worry about it. You were just angry; we should stop tiptoeing around you."

"Even so it doesn't excuse my behaviour."

"It's fine, you excused and forgiven." She told him, reaching up to hug him around the neck. "Do you want to talk about it?" She asked him gently.

"There's nothing to talk about." The hesitant smile disappeared from his face and the blank expression returned.

"James…"

"Goodnight Lily." He barked, stomping out of the room and shutting the door, leaving Lily alone with her thoughts.

* * *

The next day dawned to early for Lily, who hadn't fallen asleep till the early hours of the morning. She quickly got up and walked to her wardrobe, grabbing a black dress and black heels out of it. She tied her hair up in a bun and looked at herself in the mirror. Today was going to be a hard day; today was the day of Mr. Potter's funeral.

She quickly stepped out of her room and headed towards the dinning room, she glanced into James' room as she passed and saw the door was open and the bed was messy; he must be downstairs. She headed down slowly, trying to prepare herself for the storm of emotions today was sure to bring.

Lily didn't remember much about the ceremony, except for the constant pressure of James' hand in hers and the comforting presence of Rachel beside her. All to soon they were back at the Manor, hordes of meaningless people expressing their sympathy's for the Potter's loss. The day seemed to drag on but finally the last of the 'guests' had left and it was just the Potter's and James' friends remaining.

"Thanks for all you help kids, I can handle it from here." Mrs. Potter smiled at them, her eyes devoid of their usual twinkle. "Why don't you get something to eat?"  
"Food." Sirius eyes lit up at the thought "That's a fine idea Mum." He grinned, pecking her on the cheek in an oddly comforting gesture before running down to the kitchen, pulling poor Rachel with him. Remus, Mary and Lily followed at a more casual pace, wanting to laugh at their friends antics but they not being able to bring themselves to do it.

They were almost out of the room when Lily noticed that James wasn't following them.  
"You coming James?" she asked him

"No, I think I'll help mum clean up." He gave her another smile that didn't reach his eyes.

"Okay, but if your still hungry later then come and find us." Lily returned his smile with an equally forced one of her own before walking off with Remus and Mary.

* * *

"Whoa Lily I think maybe you should go to bed now." Mary told her friend gently as her head lolled forward for the 4th time in as many minutes.

"Yea, I probably should." She yawned "I didn't get much sleep last night."

"How come?" Rachel asked her concerned

"She was probably worrying about Jamesy boy." Sirius grinned, and was rewarded with a deep red blush from Lily. "Huh I knew it."

"Whatever, I'm going to bed now." Lily yawned yet again "Night all." Her friends chorused their goodnights as she made her way upstairs, already thinking about the softness of her mattress.

Lily didn't make it to her bedroom however, she was distracted when she walked past James' room and saw him lying stomach down on his bed, staring at a book. She quietly walked into his room and sat down on the bed beside him.

"Hey." She smiled warmly at him.

"Hey." He slammed the book shut, but not before Lily caught a glimpse of a photo album from when he was younger.

"Do you want to talk?" She asked, rubbing his back.

"There is NOTHING to talk about." He said, shrugging her hand off of his back.  
"James there obviously is something to talk about if you're this upset."  
"I'm not upset, do I look upset to you?" He barked at her, sitting up

"That's the point. You don't look sad but you're not yourself either."

"I'm fine." He repeated.

"Your obviously not, please talk to me."

"ONCE AGAIN THERE IS NOTHING TO TALK ABOUT." James finally roared standing up.

"JAMES SOMETHING IS BOTHERING YOU. YOU NEED TO TALK ABOUT IT." She screamed back at him, exasperated by his stubbornness.

"If there was something to talk about I would tell you." He was still yelling.

"No you wouldn't James, you would hide it and pretend to be strong. LIKE YOU ARE."

"I'm not hiding anything for gods sake. And I'm not _pretending _ to be anything either"

"Of course you are, why not talk it out. It will make you feel better. I know this from experience"

"Why the hell do you even care?" He roared again, trying to hold back tears.

"BECAUSE YOU'RE MY FRIEND." Lily screamed, frustrated by his pig headedness "And I love you."

"WHY?" He asked her, crying now though he was still yelling "Why do you care about me, you shouldn't."

"JAMES POTTER JUST SHUT UP. I CARE ABOUT YOU JUST LET ME HELP YOU."

"No, you don't care and I DON'T WANT YOUR HELP." James screamed back at her.

Lily stood gaping at James, tears forming in her eyes. She could see past his shoulders that her friends were standing in the doorway as shocked as she was.

"I Just… I can't deal with this." James shook sobbing and laughing at the same time. Everyone stared at him in horrid fascination until he turned on his heal and ran out of the room, knocking Mary into Remus in the processes. A few seconds later they heard the pop of him aparting, leaving shocked friends, an angry Sirius and a sobbing Lily in his wake.

**A/N:Once again MERRY CHRISTMAS. This chapter is my Christmas present to you and i think the small Christmas theme makes it appropriate. I hope i got my characterization right. If you have any problems with my story please review and tell me it helps me grow as a writer. Also Finally I have a new James/Lily story up called crashing down around them. It's a bit diffrent from this one but My skills have grown in writing this story so hopefully it will be better than even this. Remember review for a preview.**

**x's, o's and Christmas wishes**

**-Lilybet-  
**


	14. This is a gift, it comes with a price

**A/N: So i'm sorry if you thought this was a new chapter but it's not. please read on anyway if you like the story**

**So mainly i want to know are you guys still interested in this story and where I'm taking it. Please l really want to know if i should continue this story. I love it but you know if it's only for my enjoyment i'll stop uploading and rushing and fixing it and maybe even writing it down on paper, or typing it as the case may be.**

So please if you still want this story let me know, and if you want to see something happen, or an aspect you do or don't like don't hesitate to let me know, i do write as i go.

So Sorry

xoxo


End file.
